Which Christmas film is your College?
No one is Love Actually or Bad Santa
Yes, we had literally nothing else to write about, so read on if you want to know why Halifax is Arthur Christmas and why Die Hard corresponds to Wentworth College.
Oh, and Merry Christmas you filthy animals, and a happy new year from all of us too x
Home Alone – Derwent College
Arguably the greatest Christmas film of all time, Home Alone is a fixture of Christmas guide just as Christmas D is in first term. The film is also full of sick gadgets which any Derwenter will tell you is essential on a night out in Salvos – how else are you going to hold 5 VK’s at once?!
Die Hard – Wentworth
Is Die Hard even a Christmas film? Is Wentworth really a college? These are all valid questions that need to be answered and why these two are a natural fit for one another.
Arthur Christmas – Halifax College
It is on Netflix if you are THAT desperate to watch what is one of the less entertaining Christmas films, but you need to search for it – just like you have to search hard to find out exactly where Halifax is.
Elf – Vanbrugh College
Nice and cute. It’s a staple of the Christmas season, it doesn’t offend anyone and even your dad thinks Will Ferrell is funny for an American. This also sums up Vanbrugh too, no?
Home Alone 4 – Alcuin College
Alcuin is pretty much as old as Derwent but without the frills and spills, which is pretty much what Home Alone 4 is to Home Alone.
Nativity! – James College
Let's be honest, a bit simple.
The Polar Express – Constantine College
Yeah you thought the CGI was cool when you saw it with your grandma in 2004, but the entire film is literally just one long train journey to the middle of nowhere – just like what any bus journey to Constantine feels like. At least they have double beds, though.
The Nightmare Before Christmas – Goodricke College
Think back to when we said Kanye’s Dark Twisted Fantasy was Goodricke. We followed the same reasoning here. The nightmare before Christmas is a bit twisted, a bit edgy a bit too god damn Tim Burton. Just like Goodricke, it refuses to be pinned down and defined, it’s a bit out there (literally out there in Hes East).
A Christmas Carol – Langwith College
They love to whine and be miserable whenever they set foot on Hes West and tell tales about how they are one of the original colleges but had to move to Hes East. Move on.