
The Tab Guide to Exams
A step-by-step visual guide to your emotional and spiritual journey through academic testing. You’re welcome.
Certain things inevitably occur every May. It rains constantly, contestants on The Apprentice act like twats, and exam season arrives.
While we cannot offer any advice to ease the pain of the first two, The Tab have compiled a handy guide to exams to give you a quick reminder of what to expect ,in case you still haven’t quite figured it out. You’ve only had 8-12 years of annual examinations, after all.
Two weeks before the exam:
The night before the exam:
When you realise your exam is actually in North Campus:
When someone mentions something you didn’t revise just before you go in:
Giving yourself a pep-talk in your seat:
When a phone goes off:
When they say ‘five minutes left’:
When they are taking in the papers:
Leaving the exam:

The Warehouse Project warns of dangerous ketamine-like drug being circulated
A number of people have been hospitalised as a result of the substance

Manchester doesn’t believe students are withholding rent. So we’re getting the screenshots
This list is constantly being updated

Manchester offers £2k cost of living bursary but a student on highest loan gets just £300
‘I’ve got two regular part time jobs as well as occasional shift work and still struggle to make ends meet’

Manchester Uni students told if they see silverfish in halls, ‘politely tell it to leave’
The member of staff also admitted the silverfish ‘problem’ has been ongoing for years

Since you were born, Manchester Uni has raised halls rent 40 per cent above inflation
And yet the university has attempted to defend this…

Revealed: These are the exact 18 days Manchester lecturers are striking this term
Students are facing a loss of over 40 per cent allotted teaching time

Manchester Uni accuses student rent strikers of guesswork and reporting false numbers
Manchester Rent Strike told the uni to get on with supporting students rather than attacking them

Manchester Uni staff to go on strike next Wednesday as part of 18 days of action
University staff will be striking in the first week of teaching after the Christmas holidays

University of Manchester students withhold half a million pounds in rent strike protest
Organisers say 350 students have participated in this month’s rent strike

‘I simply can’t afford to pay it’: The reality of the Manchester rent strike
Around 300 first year students are withholding hundreds of thousands of pounds in rent today

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Oh and Number 9: I will lay off the booze, just a bit

Manchester Rent Strike is calling on first year students to withhold millions in rent this month
The group is calling for students to cancel their direct debits by 19th January

We rewrote this year’s John Lewis advert because it should be based in Fallow
Where better to base a festive favourite than in Fallowfield

The sad reality of a Manchester student’s Christmas dinner
We made it so you don’t have to (believe me you don’t want to)

I went to the Manchester Christmas markets so you don’t have to
Couldn’t find toilets. Had to utilise an alley behind Tesco.

New 37-storey student hall planned for Manchester and it’s going to be even taller than The Tower
Lets hope the lifts don’t break

I worked a 12-hour Squirrel’s shift and this is how it went
From noodle-filled vomit to twelve j-bombs in a row (or more realistically the other way round)

Nancy Rothwell says £9.25k fees aren’t enough despite Manchester Uni making £120 million surplus
That £170 might buy you a few shops at big Sainos but it’s not helping you beat inflation

Revealed: UoM relies on international students for nearly a third of its income
‘It’s really unfair, and kind of xenophobic’

Deepfake explained: Everything you need to know about the AI fake media taking over
Also some clues which point at if you’re watching one

The way we treat trans people will be history one day, future generations should be ashamed
Being trans has never been easy for us

All the shows you need to watch if you love Happy Valley, to fill the void of it ending
Viv Deering from No Offence has huge Catherine Cawood vibes

Meet the cast of Netflix’s new supernatural detective series Lockwood & Co
So this is what Francesca Bridgerton has been up to

You’ll never guess how old the cast of Lockwood & Co actually are in real life
I’m feeling really old now

All the LGBTQ+ influencers you should be following to make your feed even better
This is exactly what we need rn

Dami Hope hits back at ‘deluded people’ who have been comparing him to Ron on Love Island
‘You guys are so mad that I don’t fit into this narrative you’ve created for me’

Inside Molly-Mae’s Depop shop where she’s selling designer clothes for 90 per cent off
All the money goes to charity too!

Inside Matty Healey’s surprisingly beige £1.2 million London home
It’s where he has all his deep and depressing thoughts x

A huge party and SK proposes again: What’s coming in new Love Is Blind: After the Altar
Bartise and Nancy are friends now?!

This is where you recognise the cast of Netflix’s Bank of Dave from
Stylax from Plebs singing Losing My Religion? That’s going right on my watchlist

The Last of Us showed a gay love story to the mainstream audience who need to see it most
Queer people exist, even amidst the apocalypse

Molly-Mae has gained over 100k Instagram followers since announcing she’s given birth
She’s gained over half a million since she shared she was pregnant

Strikes are back but they’re not affecting uni VCs – students are the ones struggling
Stop making the uni’s poor working conditions my problem

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I could listen to Jessie talk for hours

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If I see one more Napapijri jacket, I’m going to scream

Molly-Mae has announced the name of her daughter and it’s so wholesome
No one could have guessed this(!)

A wholesome reminder of all the Love Island couples who are still together
I didn’t realise there were this many!

Happy Valley fans have a harrowing theory about why Poppy doesn’t take her coat off
I won’t know peace until I have answers

An ode to Zara: The best girl in the villa on winter Love Island 2023
The casting team are really in their bag this season