A comprehensive list of every mistake you’ll make as a fresher at Leeds

You've spent the last two years working your arse off during A-Levels, coming up with a brand new personality that's gonna make you the most popular person during freshers, and first night out you're going to ruin it all. If it helps, we've all been there.

Wanna avoid making a right tit out of yourself? Read this list, learn from our mistakes, and try and make better decisions. If that's possible.

You'll go to Space for a night out

And regret it immediately. You'll queue for an hour at least – despite already having tickets – get offered drugs by every single person in the queue (not necessarily the worst thing), only to make it inside a dingy dark room with toilets bad enough to rival festival toilets, and a DJ set by none other than Gok Wan. It's so shit it's not even a tragic night out, it's just shit.

Even the people who go don't want anyone to know they were there

You'll try and walk home from Canal Mills at least once

Even if you're lucky enough to live in Central Village (or unlucky enough to live in Lib Dock) it's still a 40 minute walk. Double that to account for heels and 5 shots too many, and then double it again because you're in a brand new city and it's the middle of the night, you're def going to get lost. And suddenly it's taken you two hours to get home. Just suck it up and pay the couple of quid for a taxi. I guarantee your feet will thank you for it.

You'll get drunk in front of all your course mates during the first week

Remember when you were so excited for all those socials with your new course mates? Yeah, that feeling fades when suddenly you're waking up at 5 in the morning, with no clue where you are, what happened the night before, next to a guy you're just praying isn't in any of your seminars. Get used to it though, cos that will happen a LOT over the next three years.

Just be thankful you didn't get drunk at a mixer in front of all your lecturers as well.

You'll definitely sleep with your flatmate

If he's fit, you might just about get away with it without too much shit from the rest of your flatmates – they'll all be too jel to be too mad. If he's not, and it was just a desperate shag cos you were feeling lonely and homesick and just wanted a cuddle, then I'm sorry but you're not living this down. Just hope he doesn't fall in love with you, and find some way to move on from it quick, unless you want things to get awks. Well, even more than they are already.

You'll get an Uber every time it rains, which is basically every day

Apologise to your bank account now, because it's going to hate you until you graduate.

You'll bring up politics at a house party and nearly get kicked out

Such a fresher move. The only time you might be able to get away with a politics discussion is when there's an election going on. And even then, NEVER at a party. No one wants to listen to you boringly prattle on about how we would all so much better off under Jezza C. No one cares.

You'll buy tickets to every fresher event and never go

Well, you might go to the first one. But then you'll realise that they're all actually quite shit, so you'll give up, cut your losses and make your way to a decent night out instead.

As long as it's not Space, of course.

You'll fall in the Roger Stevens fountain after Fruity

This happens to so many people it's practically a rite of passage now. In fact, forget what I said, this isn't a mistake, it's a good night out. Just try not to do it in the middle of December, because that water i sfucking freezing.

You'll try and save money by buying basics vodka

Do. Not. Ever. Do. This. No amount of money is worth the dirty af hangover you will have the next morning.

It's Red Stripe or nothing in Leeds anyway

You'll forget your ID on a night out

And unless you live close enough to the club that you can run back and grab it, you're gonna miss out. It's every man for himself during freshers – no one wants to waste a potential "totally mental" night out complete with an 8/10 hook up (it's freshers, no one's a perfect 10 yet) to go traipsing back to the flat with some idiot who forgot their ID.

You'll waste so many decent nights out before you learn how to tactical chunder

The most important skill you'll learn at uni. Forget any actual real life skills like washing up, ironing, or any bullshit like that, the only real thing you'll need to know – and will have perfected by the end of freshers week probs – is how to tactical chunder. There's still a week before freshers starts, better get practising. Otherwise you'll be the light weight of the group, and who wants that?

Photos from The Space Facebook page