Let’s make 2016 the year we stop saying ‘frape’

“I like cock”, “I’m a big gay”, “it’s a boy”.

You’ve probably seen some form of these statements on Facebook. The scene is always the same: some poor lad (or lass) has left their laptop/computer vacant in the company of their mates, who cannot resist wreaking havoc on their Facebook account, with the sole intention of embarrassing them into next year.

My Facebook has been ‘fraped’ – or so it was labelled at the time. And yeah, it was pretty embarrassing, and a slight betrayal of my trust. But was I forcibly penetrated against my will? No. Was I emotionally and physically traumatised after the event? No. Did I experience the pain and anguish that often follows rape victims for the rest of their life? No.

Safe to say, I wasn’t raped – not even virtually. So why does the common name for Facebook hacking include the word rape, when it has nothing to do with it?

Really?

Not only does “frape” make light of the serious subject of rape, but it compares the hijacking of a Facebook account in order to say something funny, with the hijacking of someone’s body to use it for sexual means without their consent. Rape itself is not funny, and claiming that it is, or trying to make jokes out of it, would probably lead to you getting chased out of town by a mob carrying pitchforks. So why is “frape” regarded as funny, when all it really does is play down the seriousness of rape?

Also, why do the comments always seems to involve homophobic insults, as if being gay is something to make fun of? There is a distinct lack of wit involved in the act of frape – and in the name of it – and the notion that it sustains rape culture is not something that should be overlooked.

At least this one is slightly original

It took a long time for the government to alter the definition of rape so that more crimes could be reported. If we start including other meanings – such as “Facebook rape” – then it stops meaning rape, and it no longer seems like a crime. The seriousness of the act is lost, and the people who rely on the power of the word in order to get their voice heard end up being lost in the background. The word should be taken just as seriously as the crime – rape means rape, and nothing else.

There are countless other names for it –  so let’s push “frape” out of our vocabulary, and off our laptop screens.