Edi students reveal the super weird dreams they’ve been having recently

It’s not every day you climb Arthur’s Seat with Natalie Portman

Unless you’ve been sleeping under a rock the last few weeks (hopefully not, as you will have followed the advice to #stayhome and, therefore, slept inside instead), you’ll be aware that many of us are experiencing some extremely strange dreams at the moment.

These unusual dreams we’ve all been having seem to evolve around a relatively mundane storyline, but are incredibly vivid at the same time; almost as if they are real. This may be due to underlying stress related to the current situ, but also helped by the fact we are sleeping more in quarantine than we usually would, allowing us to hit the deeper stage of sleep for longer. The more REM sleep you get, the more dreams you have.

We asked a bunch of Edinburgh students to tell us about the weird dreams they have been having recently and, let me tell you, they did not disappoint.

I broke the entire plumbing system in my house

“I was really reluctantly doing the washing up after supper when a spatula got semi stuck down the disposal. Instead of pulling it out like a normal, moral person would do, I thought ‘fuck it’, and decided to jam it right down. There was a huge screech as the whole mechanism came to a halt, and then suddenly every tap and drain in the house starting exploding with sewage water. We couldn’t get a plumber due to social distancing rules, and my family had to spend the rest of lockdown swimming around in the black water in order to get from one room to the next.” Lilly, 20

Whilst posing for a pic with Rod Stewart, a man stole my phone

“In a hotel lobby, I randomly started singing Stay With Me by the Faces, whilst holding a Rod Stewart jigsaw box. Out of nowhere, Sir Rod walks in and I rush straight over to get a picture with him. I’m a little tipsy from lunch, which obviously equals confidence. Suddenly, everyone else starts crowding around him. I give my phone to a random man to take a pic and he loses it. My sister starts taking pictures of us on her phone instead, but they come out super blurred.” Alexandra, 19

The Volturi were coming for me

“I was Bella Swan (kind of) and Edward had to hide me bc the Volturi were coming but then I had to go to church with my great aunt so I left and everyone was mad at me. Honestly, it was just so vivid that for like 20 minutes after I woke up I thought it had actually happened.” Anna, 21

I was just swimming around with bare teeth in my hand and bare seals in the water

“Had an odd one last night where I was swimming in this baby pool and they kept putting seals in the water. I was so scared but more and more seals kept being put into the pool. And then in the middle of the pool was a shark inside a cage who was going mad for all the seals (and me I like to think – cheeky). The shark banging against the cage made super vigorous vibrations which kept causing my teeth to fall out, so I was just swimming around with bare teeth in my hand and bare seals AND every time a seal went in, I had to sing the nursery rhyme about sausages sizzling in a pan and one goes BANG.” Emily, 21 

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My mum and sister got mad at me for not telling them there was a Costa machine at the service station

“Last night I dreamt I really wanted a pet but I wasn’t allowed, so I got a tiny, tiny pet spider (ew) that was orange and I kept losing it. It was like a firefly light up thingy that I kept in this old box I had. So, it was lost and I’m looking for it, then I was in a service station with mum and my sister and they were stood there holding this spider box and I was thrilled they’d found my pet! But they were so angry at me because I’d never told them there was a Costa machine there before. Then I woke up.” Millie, 20

I climbed Arthur’s Seat with Natalie Portman

“So the dream starts out pretty normal. I’m out for my daily sanctioned walk when suddenly I’m walking with actress Natalie Portman. We talked about how we are bored of our daily route around The Meadows, so we decide to climb Arthur’s Seat, because apparently they are the only two walks you can do in Edinburgh, or at least that’s what all my Instagram stories are telling me. Once we’ve reached the top though it’s starts snowing a blizzard, so naturally Natalie breaks into song. I can’t quite remember the lyrics but I know they were quarantine related, so I’m guessing my subconscious wants me to be more creative?” George, 22

I, a vegetarian, accidentally ate normal haggis

“This one had me waking up feeling physically sick!! I was with some old friends from school who I don’t know very well now at all. For reasons unbeknownst to me, we had decided to meet up in a cafe in some tiny Scottish town somewhere. For some bizarre reason, we ordered haggis wraps, with the waitress assuring me they were made using vegan haggis. As soon I started to eat it, all my friends burst out laughing and revealed it was meat. They then went on to chant ‘fake vegan, fake vegan’, as I ran to the loo to TC it up. There was a cartoon cow crying in the bathroom stall next to me and it was just the worst. I still feel sick thinking about it.” Soph, 21

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A team of people wearing hazmat suits attacked me with disinfectant in bed

“So I’m lying in bed and my bedroom door is open. I can see someone in a hazmat suit in my corridor, and they’re cleaning the entire hallway and spraying it with what I can only think is disinfectant. The hazmat suit guy then turns into an entire squad, and they all start coming towards me. I can’t move from my bed – I’m like frozen completely. They keep coming closer and suddenly they’re over my bed and I still can’t move. They start spraying me with this liquid. It’s at first burning, and then it starts fizzing. They then just like walk away. It was NOT a nice dream!” Liv, 21

We all bought smartphone rings that ended up spying on us

“I had this dream where everyone had these rings which were like holographic and were like smartphones? But in your ring, if that makes sense. It then turned out it was just a way for the company to spy on all of us and sell our information.” Ellie, 21

The hamster kept escaping from the upside down Waitrose shopping basket

“I’m at my house with my friends round, but the lounge area actually looks like my friend’s lounge in her house. We suddenly all have to hide from my dad really dramatically, as my mum tells us he’s coming to tell us off for the music being too loud. My friend and I hide in this random pantry which is really weirdly long, and we then have to look after my other friend’s hamster called Evan. However, it’s impossible because we only had an upside down Waitrose shopping basket to keep it in, and he kept climbing through the gaps. Evan starts running around the pantry and I get really scared that we have lost him.” Rosie, 19

*Names have been changed to avoid dream-shaming x