Singles of the Week: Edinburgh’s Hottest Hunnies
Roses are red, violets are blue, are any of these singles right for you?
Are you reading this alone? Are you sitting in a freezing flat, looking for love out of a single-glazed window that all of a sudden feels like a metaphor for your life? You’ve got the Valentines blues. Cheer up though, we’ve lined up four fitties all dying to be dated. Maybe even by you.
Carrie, English Language and Literature, Third Year
Middle name? Elizabeth
Drink of choice? Gin & Tonic, or a Southside if I’m feeling fancy
Favourite club in Edinburgh? Garibaldi’s: fishbowls and poles
Favourite song? ‘Friday I’m In Love’ by The Cure
What’s the perfect date in Edinburgh? The Zoo! The monkey area is my favourite. Then finish off with drinks at a rooftop bar.
Do you have a hidden talent? I can bend my feet behind my back and touch my chin.
Do you have any good pulling anecdotes? NYE 2016 I snuck into a party in Miami and made out with a New York Ranger.
If you were candy what would you be? Milky Way because I’m out of this world.
If you could have one wish, what would it be? To be able to eat whatever I want without gaining weight.
Tell us something we don’t know? I’m a classically trained opera singer.
If you want an American Sweetheart to show you some Southern hospitality then look no further. This flexible blonde bombshell from South Carolina definitely knows how to have a good time.
Josh, Economics, Third Year
Middle name? Ekenedilichukwu… but I prefer ManLikeJ.
Drink of choice? Iced Mocha, shaken not stirred, with a hint of hazelnut and a dash of sliced vanilla.
Favourite club in Edinburgh? I bring the party wherever I go, but maybe a cheeky Rascals at Bourbon.
Favourite song? I’m quite big on classics. Probably a little bit of ‘Crank That (Soulja Boy)’
What’s the perfect date in Edinburgh? Somewhere low-key, preferably out of sight and out of town, if you know what I mean.
Do you have a hidden talent? Freestyle rap
Do you have any good pulling anecdotes? Let me get back to you on that one.
If you were candy what would you be? Dark Temptation
If you could have one wish, what would it be? End world hunger.
Tell us something we don’t know? I’m a fantastic chef.
If Josh isn’t the perfect guy, then who is? If you are looking for a tall and tempting man to cook you a banging meal while freestyle rapping then here you go. Thank me later.
Michelle, Philosophy and Politics, First Year
Middle name? Marie
Drink of choice? A Bloody Mary. I need spice in my life.
Favourite club in Edinburgh? Why Not
Favourite song? ‘Kitchen Sink’ by Twenty One Pilots. Or any Alt Rock.
What’s the perfect date in Edinburgh? A hike up Arthur’s Seat and then back to the flat to eat a bunch of junk food like burgers and pizza.
Do you have a hidden talent? I got asked to join the national swimming team in Lebanon.
Do you have any good pulling anecdotes? On my 18th birthday I had to try and get 18 kisses, how successful I was I’ll leave up to you.
If you were candy what would you be? Sour Patch Kids. First I’m sour and then I’m sweet.
If you could have one wish, what would it be? Unlimited Burger King
Tell us something we don’t know? I’ve moved twelve times between eight different countries.
This trilingual beauty will certainly spice up your life, if you can get past the sassy exterior. Perhaps this brunette could be the Burger Queen to your Burger King?
Philippe, Politics and Philosophy, Third Year
Middle name? Gratien. Possibly the male version of Grace in French.
Drink of choice? An Old Fashioned cocktail
Favourite club in Edinburgh? Bourbon on Thursdays – cause I’m out with the gang, my friends.
Favourite song? ‘Lucky’ by Jason Mraz
What’s the perfect date in Edinburgh? My flat – I cook, we eat, chill, probably dance, then we make magic.
Do you have a hidden talent? My friends say I’m quite the DJ.
Do you have any good pulling anecdotes? ‘Nobody Has to Know’ by Kranium – it’s all in that song.
If you were candy what would you be? Aphrodite because she’s desirable and divine.
If you could have one wish, what would it be? To be the “George Washington” of my country.
Tell us something we don’t know? A nice girl passed on a movie with me last week; I feel bad for her. She’s sweet though.
If you’d like your world to be Philippe’d upside down, then brush up on your magic tricks and he could be yours.
Do Carrie, Josh, Michelle or Philippe tickle your pickle? Hit us up on The Tab’s Facebook page or contact them directly for the date of a lifetime.