New Year, New Term, New Me

Yes, we all take the piss out of people who say "New year, New me" – it's a classic cringe line…so here it is again! With 2017 bringing even more inflation in Freddo prices, I've been ready for a fresh year for a while now. So, here are some of my New Year's resolutions for you to secretly smirk at, knowing that they're likely to diminish in no less than a few weeks.

My NYE – a sense of 'sober' optimism (oh, the irony)

Ever been tagged in a "stay hydrated" meme? Me too. With the great blessing of Instagram, we have an easy and accessible reminder of everyone else's healthy and active lifestyles (the likes of which we can never attain with our workloads). Well, I'm going to let you in on my utterly LIFE-CHANGING secret for 2018: swapping my vodka lemonade with vodka squash. It's easy and affordable – a whole bottle of squash can last you several nights! (I add that you should be wary; the great taste of it can trick you into getting into a very wobbly state and chundering in the library toilets during your college Bop…I name no names)

Four time best supermarket winner, need I say any more?

After having my mum's Aldi receipts shoved in my face all Christmas, tormenting me about all the money Mainsbury's is stealing from me, I've made the New Year's resolution to reinvent myself as a savvy Aldi-shopper. If you do big hauls, go with some friends, walk the journey there and split a taxi back – you'll still be saving money! Listen to this: hummus is 65p in Aldi and is £1.30 at your Sainsbury's local, a pretty big deal in my life! Even better, Aldi has absolutely everything you will ever need, the crazy aisle in the middle which sells the most random of items (ski goggles, camp chairs and handbags have all featured) is always a surprisingly fun experience! I only remark that I'm not the biggest fan of their sauces… after all, it's got to be Heinz.

"But it's just so cosy."

Now, this next one is a must for all the arts students – getting up earlier! By the end of last term, I was tired (excuse the pun) of hearing "wow, you're definitely an English student" as a retort to my late risings. For 2018, I'm reinventing myself as one of those really productive people who actually uses the hours of the day wisely, so wish me luck. My secret tactic (trialled and tested with success) was get an alarm clock and situate it somewhere on the other side of your room. That dreamy ringing in the morning will force you to get out of bed, because you won't be able to stand it for more than 3-5 seconds. So far, I say tentatively, this resolution is working out super well for me; I love having time for pre-lecture breakfast and a coffee. Who knew there were so many hours in the day?

This is 2017 me, regretting what I did not do. Don't be like 2017 me, kids.

My final resolution sounds like an inspirational quote you'd find on a "Common Girl" account on Twitter, "Regret doing things instead of regretting not doing things". Now I realise this is potentially problematic and there must be boundaries e.g. I'd definitely regret eating marmite more than I'd regret not eating it. However, I'm referring to things that are more in the moment. For instance, I want to regret approaching a fit boy/girl and getting embarrassingly rejected, as opposed to regretting not doing it, and wondering if they were the love of my life… Being a 'yes' person can be daunting, but take a few risks and sees what happens, instead of comfortably sitting in your room just watching Netlix! (Though, of course, I can't condemn the odd Netflix sesh).

Although we're sick and tired of hearing the "New year, New Me" line, I do believe that a new year is a great way to try new things; be bold and reinvent yourself as someone who does things, not someone who watches other people doing things! Be that person who boasts about their bargain shopping list at Aldi. Be that person who at least tried to pull the fitty in the club. But most of all, be that person who makes some great resolutions and actually (plot twist), sticks to them.