Valentine’s Day: The singleton’s nightmare

Love is the worst.

Alcohol Cambridge loneliness single valentine's day

Brace yourself students of Cambridge, Valentine’s Day is fast approaching.

It’s time to prepare ourselves for the sickly pink and red hearts adorning shop windows and cute couples reminding everyone about their ‘oh, so romantic’ date plans that they have obnoxiously organised for that special night.

Ewww gross

Amidst RAG blind date updates – check out the Tab’s blog for all the hot gossip – I feel that it’s only fair to hear from Cambridge’s finest singles as we count down to the most amorous day of the year.

I’ve been catching up with a few lonely souls to find out what plans they have in mind for the 14th of February.

The first fresher I asked immediately told me she was going to be sitting in her room, crying softly to herself and wondering where it all went wrong. Not the most positive start, to say the least.

That’s okay, the Internet can love me.

Still, there must be some people willing to embrace the single life with a more optimistic attitude. Very little inspiration came from a group of Trinity Natscis, who proceeded to give me a detailed explanation of their plans to drink copious amounts of vodka and play Call of Duty for six hours straight. Lads On Tour.

There are many varied opinions surrounding the Valentine’s Day hype. Some think it’s a great excuse to express affection, whilst others take a slightly more cynical view that it’s simply an excuse for commercial moneymaking.

Singleton Amy studying English argued that Valentine’s Day is just a “way for shops to produce generic crap that men feel obliged to buy, but that doesn’t really express any true sentiment” as she set fire to a teddybear holding a heart with the word ‘love’ sewn onto it.

Yeah, Valentine’s is superficial and consumerist. But look at the whale!

Does this suggest that Valentine’s Day is sexist? Does society expect one person in the relationship to put in more effort than the other? Sounds like Varsity territory to me. I’ll leave it for you to consider.

I asked Amy if her opinion would change if she happened to have a boyfriend to celebrate with this year. Her response:

“I don’t know, maybe. It’s such a hypocritical day. In principle, I’m against the idea because we shouldn’t need an excuse to show affection to the people we love, whether that is in a romantic, or purely platonic way.”

Overall, there seems to be a sombre, if not indifferent, attitude towards Valentine’s Day from Cambridge’s single population. However, singletons seem to have chosen to make the most of the day, when it is socially acceptable to eat too much chocolate and drink too much alcohol.

You are getting inside me tonight.

Plans include the RAG Anti-Valentine’s Day movie and cocktail night taking place at the Cambridge Union, and ‘Galentine’s Day’ celebrations (shout out to all the single ladies).

Additional note; don’t attempt to ask for opinions whilst in a Cambridge library.

Quote: “so what do you think of Valentine’s day?”

Librarian: “shhh”.


So enjoy your single Valentine’s Day! If you get too lonely, read The Tab.