Fifty Grades of Dismay

Last week, Law first years were surprised to find the unpublished prequel to 50 Shades of Grey in their Criminal Law Tripos paper.

For Question 10, the students were expected to grapple with the legal intricacies of vomit, vodka shots and hot nipple wax.

The explicitly graphic question went as follows:

“Christian, a 15 year old who looked older, was determined to lose his virginity and consequently decided to go to the notorious Club XXX. Christian had a number of vodka shots to steady his nerves, which made him feel very drunk In the course of the evening the following events occurred.

1. On his way to the toilet Christian was walking unsteadily. He knocked into Grace, causing her to spill her drink on the floor. Theodore slipped on the spilt drink and fell against a table. He bruised his allow as a result and broke a glass.
2. Christian was approached by Anastasia, who was 22 and very drunk, and who, lifting up her top, asked him to pour hot candle wax onto her naked breasts. This he did. Anastasia kissed Christian passionately, but then went home.
3. Christian was approached by Mia, who was 19 and very drunk, and who thought he was her ex-boyfriend Elliot. Calling him Elliot, she expressed surprise that he was in the club and asked him to go to a storeroom with her. Christian said that was not his name, but he was so drunk that his words were slurred. Once in the storeroom, Christian removed Mia’s clothes, but then vomited violently over her and she left in disgust.

What offences, if any, have been committed?”

This is definitely not something that any Cambridge students could possibly relate to

Wolfson Law student, Alexander Bradley-Sitch, said, “This was a fun question with lots to it, particularly related to how alcohol affects consent and a defendant’s culpability.

“It’s always fun to have an absurd narrative in these problem questions; it makes the exam more interesting.

“I did a past Company Law paper recently that involved three directors, Ron, Hermione and Harry, running a company called Hogwarts Plc. I guess law examiners have a sense of humour (sort of).

“Given that there was also a problem with a guy and a girl involved in a botched robbery of a restaurant, I figure Professor Virgo must’ve been watching Pulp Fiction the night before he wrote the paper.”

Come across any unusual questions in your exams? Let us know!