Me, a boyfriend?! Bitch please, don’t kill my vibe – Part 2

Catch up on Part 1 here.

Muhammad knows best.

Here’s how to turn rejection into the best thing that could have happened to you.

Step 1: Face Disappointment

Let yourself feel hurt, and sad, and disappointed, and angry. There’s absolutely no use in pretending that you ‘like, totally weren’t attached anyway’. That’s a sign of weakness.

You want to be strong? Start with daring to face up to your emotions, no matter how painful they are. Then you’ll actually get to know yourself, and accept yourself, and suddenly, one day, the shitty feeling will go away and you’ll feel even better than you did before all the Herbert crap went down.

And chick, never forget – so many of us are going through the same thing!

Step 2: Get Inspired

Right, now you’re over the emotional shiz, it’s time to get control of yourself and become a woman of power. Yes, I did just say that – I too am smiling, but it’s true.

To get you started, don’t miss the essential step: go on to Youtube, and find that famous video of Muhammad Ali telling the world “I’m young, I’m handsome, I’m fast, I’m pretty”.

It’s just the greatest thing ever. And then on your way to the library that morning, repeat to yourself “Well I’m young, I’m handsome, I’m fast, I’m pretty!”

And tell yourself the same thing when you wake up in the morning, and when you’re walking down the street, and when you’re about to walk into room full of people. And if you don’t believe it? Pretend to yourself that you do, and soon, you will!

Obviously, don’t actually tell someone that you’re young and handsome and fast and pretty. You’ll probably get smacked. (By the way, if there are any boys reading this, you should do this too: it’s just a great self-confidence exercise.)

Excuse me, sir. I’m young, I’m handsome, I’m fast, I’m pretty.

Step 3: What you Visualise, you can Materialise

Seriously, do I need to remind you that you’re at Cambridge, and that time is running out, fast? Well yes I do, because we all seem to forget that all the time. There are probably at least 10 people out there whose dream it is to be in your position, and you’re spending a vast proportion of your precious time feeling miserable and disappointed on account of boys? Nah ah ah! This ain’t gonna happen, and girls, remind each other of that!

Ladies, this is the peak of our lives so far. It’s also a crucial development phase where we can discover what we love and value as we move into adulthood. We won’t get this time back, so for god’s sake, get your priorities right. Focus on improving yourself and be the best you can be.

If you do anything for me today, remember this phrase: I’m gonna look the best, and think the best, and be the best.

Next time you walk out of your front door, say that to yourself (preferably with a bit of attitude). Start eating healthily, go for runs, join debating, play chess, take up blind wine tasting (which, for the record, is amazing); whatever floats your boat, whatever you find interesting but have been a bit nervous to start. Who gives a crap about finding a boyfriend, when there’s just so much to do to find yourself! And the best thing is, making this (great) life choice will make you shine, which’ll give others watching you the courage to shine too.

As for the Pablos and Herberts of the world – well, they can stand on the sidelines and just watch how fabulous you are! When the time’s right, it’ll happen.

By the way, I’m not suggesting you don’t touch boys with a barge pole. If Herbert comes grovelling back as you’re pulling the worm move on the Cindies D-floor, the choice is yours: if you’re feeling it, go for it! Have a wild and passionate night… You know the risks!

Or google cats that look like leopards

I’ll finish with another quote by Muhammad Ali, because I love him:

“There’s not a man alive who can whup me. I’m too fast. I’m too smart. I’m too pretty. I should be a postage stamp. That’s the only way I’ll ever get licked.”

Good luck with exams everyone!