Royal Baby Publicity Punt

The Punting Company makes a splash with its own Royal announcement, writes JOE WHITWELL


How does one celebrate a future monarch’s birth?

Name a punt after them, of course.

This morning, if the paint has finished drying and the royal baby’s name has been announced, a new vessel will be launched (or relaunched) onto the Cam.

The Prince <insert name here> of Cambridge, will join its parent vessel The Duke and Duchess of Cambridge on the river to what will surely be deafening applause from bewildered tourists.

William and Kate on a Punt, ,An 'Artists Impression' - Cambridge News

William and Kate enjoying a day out, an ‘Artist’s Impression’ – Cambridge News

Sam Matthews, managing director of the punting company in question, “The Punting Company”, hoped that the couple would be “really pleased”.

Whilst The Tab has neither the contacts nor the resources to confirm or deny the Royal response, we have been inundated with reactions from students.

A Selwyn LandEc proclaimed that this was the “greatest honour that Cambridge could bestow.”

A recent graduate Medic from Clare thought the move was “cute.”

TabTV's very own Chloe 'Chloy' Harris celebrates outside Buckingham Palace

TabTV’s very own Chloe ‘Chloy’ Harris celebrates outside Buckingham Palace

Perhaps the best response of all came from a King’s Linguist, who simply said of the announcement: “Meh.”

The boat will be the first of presumably many to be named after the third in line to the throne and future King.

Some slightly more cynical students have claimed that this is a “publicity stunt” just “to make money”.

The newest royal has been offered free rides on its waterborne namesake whenever they like however – so it might prove a useful little side-earner for the Prince.