We assigned each new Noah Kahan song a Durham cry spot

It’s exam season in Durham, and whether this is your first uni exam experience or you are a seasoned veteran, it ultimately brings one thing: lots of tears. A humbling time, don’t worry, most of us have an embarrassing public cry from time to time. Lucky for you, though: Noah Kahan has just released his latest and most cry-able album yet! So, buckle up, here’s each cry spot’s new Noah Kahan song.

End of August – Observatory Hill

Starting off strong, Observatory Hill is perfect for those committed to cry with a good view. A classic Durham cry-spot, it does risk some awkward side-eyes during the post-exam picnic outings, but worth it. The cinematic swell at the end would go perfectly with a sunset and maybe a bottle of chicken wine to swig in between sobs, definitely main character energy.

Doors – Van Mildert Pond

I know this is a rogue one, but trust me, that first year Hill College breakdown beside the depressing Mildert pond hits different. ‘Doors’ has enough of a beat to stop you wanting to have a depressed midnight swim but still fits the anxious insecurity that the song is about. The imposter syndrome in this song, pure anxiety about being unknown and unworthy, is the only explanation for such a drastic decision to cry by Van Mildert of all places.

American Cars – North Road 

North Road needs no explanation for why it is a staple Durham cry-spot; the amount of alcohol induced tears (and vomit) that have been shed is astronomical. Like North Road, ‘American Cars’ is about desperately wanting to escape somewhere that somehow keeps pulling you back, an experience akin to Babs and Loft nights out.

The Great Divide – Billy B toilets

Not proud of it, (wo)man enough to say it: I’ve had a cheeky cry in the Billy B toilets before, a canon event. ‘The Great Divide’ captures the guilt of knowing you should face the reality you’ve been avoiding, which makes it the perfect soundtrack to a Billy B toilet cry instead of revising. The hope for a brighter future, though, is a good reminder in the song. So, while you’re hiccupping in the Level 3 cubicles, just think of the post-exam feral summer activities that are about to happen!

Willing and Able – Botanic Gardens

The Botanic Gardens is a classic Durham date spot, so it’s no surprise that, in the aftermath of a particularly complicated breakup, it is also a classic wallowing cry spot. ‘Willing and Able’ is all about being unable to see the worst in someone, and being stuck in the cycles of the past in present relationships. So, while you wander the gardens debating whether the relationship really was that bad (it was), take solace that you’re not the first to be blind to the reality of someone.

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Porch Light – Engineering Department 

If you’ve had the pleasure of entering the engineering department to study (and cry), it’s strangely cold and filled with ghosts that can only fit this song. Engineering students, and those who have lost hope in the world, study in that freezing cold department until, as Kahan’s song suggests, they return home inevitably to the ‘Porch Light’ since it’s 2am. A strange but perhaps underrated choice, the engineering department is an undiscovered cry-spot gem, and even better, you can upgrade your cry with the department showers.

Downfall – College bar toilets 

Durham is incredibly small; chances are that an unfortunate run-in with a figure from your past, combined with just the right amount of drinks, can result in a cry in the toilets of a busy college bar. Kahan’s song is all about the selfish side of counting on someone’s downfall so they return to you, a sentiment well summed up in the awkward bar-side drunken small-talk to an ex, followed by a frustrated tear or two in the toilets.

Dan – Riverside Walk

As a positive ending to this article, ‘Dan’ presents a song about the comfort of friendship in times of loneliness. The riverside walk is the most wholesome break to the stress and chaos of student life, a great way to reconnect in nature after a particularly eventful or traumatic night out with a friend, so it is only right that it should share the spot with Kahan’s wholesome tribute to his lifelong friend. Whether you want to cry out of laughter or embarrassment at hearing of last night’s antics, ‘Dan’ and the River Wear have in common their tendency to bring out the existential in everyone.

So, whether your exam season breakdown takes place overlooking the River Wear, in a Billy B level 3 cubicle, or halfway down North Road after one too many shots, at least Noah Kahan has provided the perfect soundtrack for it. Durham may be academically brutal and emotionally humbling, but if there’s one thing the city does well, it’s scenic suffering spots. Good luck surviving this exam season, and remember: tears are temporary but embarrassing cry spot memories are forever, so make it count.

Featured image via Canva.

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