Girls have game?

Lizzie Ellis investigates the pulling-power of the fairer sex.

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The onus tends to fall on those testosterone-filled, Y-chromosome carrying males to make the first move. But what about when they don’t have the balls to?

I have no game. It’s no secret. Everyone who knows me knows it. It’s not that I can’t talk to those of the opposite sex. It’s just that it turns out comparing a guy to the President of Syria is no way to get in his pants.

Who knew?

Arguably my poor follow-through is down to excessive consumption of alcohol. People talk of alcohol making you ‘lose your inhibitions’ but for me it’s more a matter of losing my verbal filter, and although some people might consider this to be liberating or refreshing, I think that the unfortunate males that I talk to tend to be more alarmed than aroused.

Upon raising this issue with my housemates, one of them chimed in that girls cannot have game. Apparently it’s not a thing. It is a long-established fact that all girls have to do to capture the interest of a guy is stand there and have a vagina.

If this is true then I feel like I should definitely get a lot more male attention than I do. I have no hobbies to speak of so my entire life essentially consists of standing around with a vagina. So I’m sure there must be more to ‘closing’ than this. Some kind of analogy about the difference between having the ability to get a fish to bite and having the skill to reel it in seems appropriate here.

Girls can put on the moves too, apparently

I already feel bad that guys tend to have to make the first move so I’d at least like to make it easier for them. As well as this, I’m sure there are many guys out there who don’t have the balls to just go up to a girl and show her how good their chat is.

It would appear that sometimes it is necessary for girls to take matters into their own hands.It’s only when one lacks game, that one can appreciate that other girls have it.

So to those of you who think that by virtue of being female you can score, take a minute and think of us mojo-less crones who are forced to keep our cupboards stocked with a healthy supply of Rufilin.