Ten things you only know if you ever lived in Hugh Stewart Hall

The old block vs. new block beef is real

2 years ago

It is well known amongst UoN students that the Hugh Stewart name comes with a certain level of status. As the biggest hall on campus Hugh Stewart, or Hugh Stew as it’s known to us veterans, has a strong army of roughly 340 residents. It’s widespread reputation often means that plenty of others have come into contact with the hall.

Whether you have been invited to a legendary pres, gone for a cheeky drink at the bar or perhaps accidentally woken up in a Hugh Stew bed after a rough night at Crisis, everyone will have had a uniquely different Hugh Stew experience. Hopefully past and present residents of the iconic hall can relate to these ten quirks that sum up the biggest, and best, hall on campus.

1. A playground for the posh

Hugh Stew’s reputation has been known to precede itself and we can confirm it is in fact a home away from home for UoN’s Southerner population. With what feels like 90% of its occupants consisting of privately educated home county darlings. If you haven’t met a Tilly, Hugo, or Tarquin amongst a sea of Ralph Lauren sweaters and signet rings then you’re probably in the wrong hall.

2. The perks of proximity

Hugh Stew’s central location is sure to compliment the lazy student lifestyle. Whilst you roll out of bed and arrive at your lecture looking preened to perfection; you can smugly await the arrival of your West and Sports zone mates dripping in a puddle of their own sweat.

3. We love Latitude

This well-known gem of a bar is a great way to kick off your night out. Spin the wheel of fortune and see if you can win a shot, or even better a plate of Latitude’s famous cheesy nachos.

4. Pantry antics

If your pantry didn’t constantly look like a swimming pool, were you even in Hugh Stew?

5. Fancy formals

Nothing beats getting all dolled up for your Instagram, staggering into the dining room one bottle of wine deep and probably not making it past your first course. Therefore, a definitive Hugh Stew highlight is its eclectic range of formals. For instance, the Burns Night formal is a great way to showcase Hugh Stew’s Scottish roots. Pass us the haggis please.

6. Instagrammable views

The scenery of Hugh Stew is unlike any other hall. Its grand Hogwarts-esque exterior is enough to impress anyone. Although, there is nothing more embarrassing than proudly showing your mates a Google image of a sprawling mansion; only to realise that you’re actually slumming it in new block. Yikes.

7. Old block vs. New block

Now when it comes to infamous rivalries a few may instantly spring to mind: Joan Davis vs. Betty Crawford, Muhammad Ali vs Joe Frazier, but have you heard of Hugh Stew’s old block vs. new block? This deep-rooted conflict is spurred by a love to hate one another. Will there ever be a champion block, who knows?

8. The joys of shared toilets

The luxury of an ensuite is a rare sight in Hugh Stew, which often means coming home from a lecture and bracing yourself for whatever monstrosity has been deposited in your shared loo. We recommend investing in some bleach and a positive mental attitude.

9. Breakfast blues

Breakfast at Hugh Stew is certainly an eerie sight. If you actually visit the dining hall at this ungodly hour then you either have too much time on your hands or you’re an insomniac. Sorry, I don’t make the rules.

10. Smokers galore

The stony walls of Hugh Stew are known to hold the many secrets that its residents like to share over the odd ciggie. Such wisdom is best left untold; although we have heard the archway is the place to be. We hope you can find your block amongst a cloud of smoke and a chorus of “Rahhh where’s my baccy?”.