Just a list of all the events happening in Nottingham that you probably can’t go to, because exams ruin lives
Cruel, cruel world
Lauren KenworthyExam season makes May a unique kind of hell. Just look at all the things you could do if you were allowed to live.
Try not to cry into that text book, it’s expensive.
Soul Jam
This is happening tonight so you could probably risk this one and still scrape your 2:1. But is it worth the guilt knowing you should be revising like everyone else?
Up to you tbh, I’m not taking responsibility for your mistakes.
Cause and Effect at Stealth
Having sold out 3 events in Nottingham before, Cause and Effect are back at Stealth on May the 12th. Which is early enough for you to risk if you’re in first or second year, third years, you sit back down at that desk please.
Wigflex Rough Trade Terrace Sessions
This is FREE. But its the 26th of May so unless by some miracle you’ve finished 4 days into exam season, you still can’t go.
Here’s the event description just to make you even sadder:
“Music supplied by our friends and family… StreetFood Revolution UK and the Rough Trade brewery will supply you lot with food to fill the largest guts and liquor to keep those eyes looking like the Ronaldo statue…”
Shapes – Secret Headliner
Alright, this isn’t until the 1st of June so some of you might be able to go but I can’t. Pity me and all those like me, pray for our lost souls.
Dot to Dot Festival
On the 28th of May this festival is back, being held at venues across the city, and guess what, you can’t go.
Wigflex presents – Craig Richards and Objekt
Branded as their first party of the summer, Wigflex can start their summer on the 2nd of June. You can’t.
Oh, and Craig Richards is a Fabric DJ just to rub some salt in that wound.
Another Bank holiday weekend
Just like the one we just had you won’t even notice this happen, Hallward looks the same on a bank holiday as it does any other bloody day.
People actually their enjoying lives
Not you. You don’t get to be part of this. Get out.
Fuck exams man.
Hydro Flask
OnlyFans model says parents should be ‘thanking’ her for sleeping with Nottingham students
George Palmer-SoadyThe adult star encouraged ‘virgins’ to attend the ‘educational’ events held during Freshers’ Week
Man arrested after being seen ‘shimmying up a drain pipe’ of a Nottingham student house
Charlotte WrightHe was then seen climbing through the house’s window on Lenton Boulevard
Rufus Redding
Students evacuated after fire breaks out at Nottingham nightclub during Freshers’ Week
Ella KeeneVideos show smoke coming out of the venue’s doors
Here’s a list of things you should do during your first few weeks in Nottingham halls
Olivia HooperEssential for a successful start to first year
OnlyFans model says she’s slept with more than 100 men in Nottingham during freshers tour
Tegan Maass‘Bonking uni students and their dads has made me rich’
Mother of Nottingham attack victim urges police chief to resign after ‘horror’ decision
‘I did not think my opinion of this force and its leadership could sink any lower’
‘I am truly sorry’: NHS trust boss gives apology to families of Nottingham attack victims
He has offered his ‘heartfelt apologies’ for letting the families down
Nottingham strip club says it’s not chasing students after trying to lower entry age to 18
‘As good as the students are for the city, they are certainly not our target audience’
Here are all the best ways to beat homesickness as a Nottingham student
Solange MelladoBecause being a fresher should be fun and chaotic, not sad and lonely
The seven types of flatmates you’ll encounter in halls as a Notts fresher
George ElijahGet ready to meet the wild, weird, and wonderful flatmates of Notts halls
Two people have been arrested following a serious crash near Nottingham Trent campus
Gaia CappelloTwo passengers have sustained life-threatening injuries
All aboard: Nottingham’s free evening 906 hopper bus returns next week
The bus service will connect University Park Campus to Lenton and Beeston
Nottingham students evacuated after a fire at a city centre block of flats
No one was reported to be injured
Nottingham bus drivers win award after helping student who was stranded after night out
‘It never ceases to amaze us just how wonderful our driving team are and the care they show’
We’re recruiting new writers! Here’s why you should join The Tab Nottingham’s team
Come to our open meeting from 5pm on Monday 30th September at Mooch!
Looking for a bargain? New NET offer means Nottingham students can travel for 82p a day
The reduced prices are available until the 20th October
Daily Mail released uni rankings and Nottingham is lower down than I expected
University of Nottingham is the fourth lowest Russell Group uni
Former Nottingham University student found guilty of female genital mutilation charge
He referred to the crime as ‘something normal’
Nottingham student who broke his back is taking on the world’s largest half marathon
Jared Lewis is raising money to help those who have suffered similar injuries
The experts flopped! A definitive roundup of the most mismatched MAFS UK couples ever
Harrison BrocklehurstWhat on EARTH were they thinking!?
These 30 unhinged MAFS UK 2024 memes will keep you entertained until the show’s back
Claudia CoxI’ll be laughing over those fajitas for three to five working days
Nick admits he massively regrets comparing himself to Henry Cavill in Love Is Blind pods
Ellie Ring‘That’s a bad celebrity comparison’
All of Lacey’s many attempts to get famous before MAFS UK 2024
Hayley SoenAre there any cast members who haven’t been on Celebs Go Dating?
People think a huge MAFS UK scene with Eve and Charlie was cut after heated exit
Sofia AiraThere was definitely more behind the scenes that we didn’t see
Hannah ‘doesn’t regret’ her choice to write list of red flags about Nick on Love Is Blind
But admits she never meant for him to see it in the first place
All the green flags that prove Kieran from MAFS UK 2024 is a gem among men
He wrote a song for Kristina and it’s not even cringey
Kristina has ended our misery and posted statement about contents of mystery blue liquid
Finally I can sleep at night
P Diddy denied bail twice as he’s labelled a ‘danger to the community’ by judge
He will have to be detained until his trial
MAFS UK and Love Is Blind officiant explains how she knows which marriages will last
I’m guarding Kristina and Kieran with my life
Huge MAFS UK editing error proves Kieran and Kristina’s dinner conversation was all staged
I actually can’t believe they messed this up so badly
Here he goes! I regret to inform you Liam Payne is once again being a menace to society
He got so annoying at Niall Horan’s concert that security had to intervene
Kim Kardashian slams media for turning Menendez brothers into ‘eye candy’ in lengthy essay
She called upon them to be freed and claimed they were ‘not monsters’ when she visited them in jail
Charlie reveals ‘turning point’ when she knew relationship with Eve ‘could never come back’
And admitted the one thing Eve could have done to save the relationship
Kesha says her boyfriend broke up with her because she didn’t take him to a Taylor Swift party
She purposely didn’t invite him to check if he was with her for the wrong reasons
Major Love Is Blind editing error finally proves the pods are completely staged
They haven’t even tried to cover this up
Lacey reveals MAFS UK producers ‘told’ them to make fajitas and her mum had ‘no say’ in it
She also explained Nathan and her mum cuddled on the sofa afterwards but scene was cut
Ok, Margaret Qualley just spilled on if she wore prosthetic boobs in The Substance
‘Unfortunately, there is no magic boob potion’
Where the MAFS UK 2024 weddings were filmed, and how rich you’d have to be to get married there
If it’s good enough for royalty, then it’s good enough for MAFS
An expert explains why the TikTok ick list trend could be ruining your relationship
Don’t listen to Love Is Blind – ick lists are bad!
The tragic amounts it costs to go to the highest achieving UK private schools in 2024
Apparently being rich makes you better at GCSEs