Just a list of all the events happening in Nottingham that you probably can’t go to, because exams ruin lives

Cruel, cruel world

Exam season makes May a unique kind of hell. Just look at all the things you could do if you were allowed to live.

Try not to cry into that text book, it’s expensive.

Soul Jam

This is happening tonight so you could probably risk this one and still scrape your 2:1. But is it worth the guilt knowing you should be revising like everyone else?

Up to you tbh, I’m not taking responsibility for your mistakes.

Facebook event

Cause and Effect at Stealth 

Having sold out 3 events in Nottingham before, Cause and Effect are back at Stealth on May the 12th. Which is early enough for you to risk if you’re in first or second year, third years, you sit back down at that desk please.

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Wigflex Rough Trade Terrace Sessions

This is FREE. But its the 26th of May so unless by some miracle you’ve finished 4 days into exam season, you still can’t go.

Here’s the event description just to make you even sadder:

“Music supplied by our friends and family… StreetFood Revolution UK and the Rough Trade brewery will supply you lot with food to fill the largest guts and liquor to keep those eyes looking like the Ronaldo statue…”

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Shapes – Secret Headliner

Alright, this isn’t until the 1st of June so some of you might be able to go but I can’t. Pity me and all those like me, pray for our lost souls.

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Dot to Dot Festival 

On the 28th of May this festival is back, being held at venues across the city, and guess what, you can’t go.

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Wigflex presents – Craig Richards and Objekt 

Branded as their first party of the summer, Wigflex can start their summer on the 2nd of June. You can’t.

Oh, and Craig Richards is a Fabric DJ just to rub some salt in that wound.

Our next brickworks session. Two of the best bringing the slop. #craigrichards #objekt #wigflex 🍦

A post shared by Wigflex (@lukas_wigflex) on

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Another Bank holiday weekend

Just like the one we just had you won’t even notice this happen, Hallward looks the same on a bank holiday as it does any other bloody day.

People actually their enjoying lives 

Not you. You don’t get to be part of this. Get out.

Fuck exams man.

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