English and Philosophy is a complete doss

Enjoy ur dissertation bitchez

People give English and Philosophy students stick for having an ‘easy course’ but really they are just jealous.

While our main struggle is to differentiate between the Lucy’s and Chloe’s and Emily’s and Ellie’s of the course, other students are pulling their hair out over their endless revision and desperate attempt to get a 1st.

It’s easy to understand why people dislike us when we’re relaxing reading a book whilst other people slave over their revision notes. The best thing about English is that you don’t even need to read all the books! You can get a 2:1 from reading a summary of Sparknotes.

We’ll get jobs and not just in teaching

Haters will claim that English and Philosophy won’t get you a grad job, but in reality they have a higher employability rate than the majority of subjects. Many people have smugly asked me what job I want to go into, before asking “Unless you teach English surely your degree is useless?” As well as having high employability rates, English and Philosophy students have the basic ability to write emails and letters properly, analyse, and communicate their way through the working world while all you can talk about is the erosion of rocks.

We don’t actually do any work

Some people suggest that ‘Philosophy is a degree of bullshit” – and they are right! As long as you are able to argue, show understanding and write an essay you can scrape that 2:1 with hardly any work. This doesn’t mean that Philosophy is shit however – it is always seen in the top degrees for employment.

All the hate for doing my ‘white girl’ degree is so worth it. Not only do we really enjoy our subjects, but there’s that feeling of superiority when everyone else is crying about their dissertation and you’re polishing off a module that is 70 per cent assessed by poster presentation (in third year!).

English and Philosophy students get to breeze through Uni with very little effort and relatively respectable grades.

70% poster assessment in 3rd year – easier than A levels

So bitch all you like about our course – we’ll be the ones on a night out the day before an exam and still get a 2:1 whilst you stress all year.