What Goldie Lookin’ Chain can Teach you about Student Debt

What could a group of rappers possibly know about your undergraduate study? OLLIE LEE explains…

chain debt finance goldie loan lookin' student tax

Have you ever played Taboo? It's a board game. You get a card with a word on it, then you try to describe it to your teammates without using the word itself. To win you need only three things: a mouth; friends who aren't thick; and luck.

 
You need luck because in Taboo some words are harder than others. If your card said 'student debt' your teammates would never get the answer.
 
That's because if you described student debt without using those exact words, everybody would think you were talking about a tax. Whisper it: there is no such thing as a student loan. It's all in your head.
 
It automatically gets taken out of your wages…
 
        Tax?
 
No, no. You only pay above a certain level of income…
 
        Like tax?
 
NO. As you earn more the amount you pay goes up…
 
        Yeah. Tax?
 
You're shit at this game. The answer is “crippling levels of student debt”. I'm off to make a banner and occupy the Vice-Chancellor's office.
 
In 2010 the Government decided to raise fees, and since then all the talk has been about whether student can AFFORD to go to uni. But how can affordability be the right word for something students are not ACTUALLY paying for? When I say 'not paying for', I'm referring to what I like to call “Goldie Lookin's Law”.
 
In the same way that “guns don't kill people, rappers do”, we need people to get it into their heads that STUDENTS DON'T PAY FEES, GRADUATES DO.
 
That's because fees – the cost of your degree – fall as an extra tax once you're an employed graduate. A complicated tax, sure. But IT'S NOT A LOAN. With a loan you repay straight away. You repay all of it. You repay loans even when you're out of work because you're sick or unlucky or lazy. If you don't repay some loans a bailiff comes to kick you out of your house.
 
All of those things sound scary. And they should do. They're the reasons why you should usually be wary of taking on debt.
 
By insisting on using the phrase 'student debt' we scare people. We scare them more than they need to be scared. Of the people who decide NOT to pay £9000 next year, for some of them it will be because they are simply be too scared of 'debt' to study for a degree. That's not good.
 
Student unions can put up as many banners as they want criticising the Government for raising fees. But the whole time they're using the phrase 'student debt' they are complicit in shutting people out of higher education.
 
For your average 18 year old I think tax is a LOT less scary than debt. I think we can use better language to help keep people in education.
 
Let's claim the word 'tax'. It's simple – we can just start saying 'tax' whenever we talk about paying for uni. I don't care what they call the Student Loan Company any more than you care if Hoover makes your hoover. If it looks like a tax and it feels like a tax, let's call it a tax.
 
A degree represents good value for money and ANYBODY who wants it can afford it – why should that view be Taboo?