This is every type of person you’ll meet in your University of East Anglia halls

Good luck surviving a year with some of these people


Most of us spent Freshers’ Week pretending to be people we’re not while getting to know our flatmates. We move in, hopeful to see the kinds of people we’ll be spending a year with. We wonder what everyone’s quirks will be, and if everyone will get along. And then slowly as the year progresses, we find out what they’re really like. Sometimes you’ll end up meeting a friend for life, but other times you’ll be stuck with a mismatched group of teens. It really is just luck deciding who you end up with. So, here is everyone you’ll meet in your University of East Anglia halls:

The straight-As student

This person is used to getting consistently high grades in school. They value their education above all else, sacrificing many a social event to get that one assignment done on time, and they don’t intend to change once moving to uni either. Even though first year doesn’t count for many students, they will still work all through the night to get that summative submitted a week early. Honestly I can’t really complain about this one, you’ve got to respect the grind.

The ghost

Similar to the straight-As student, you’ll rarely see this person in the flat. When do they even eat? They never seem to leave their room, and the only time you see them is when they go to a lecture. You saw them on moving-in day, but barely since then. I’m not sure they even exist anymore. Regardless, they’re not the worst one at all. At least they leave no trace behind in the kitchen.

The gourmet ‘chef’

This person really thinks they’re the next big cook. They always make the most complicated meals, throwing in all kinds of exotic ingredients. However, maybe use a few less spices next time. If I can smell it from my room above the kitchen, then maybe it’s a bit much. I’m always wondering how they can afford so much random food on a student budget. How can you be buying four kilograms of chicken a week with your maintenance loan?

The not-ready-to-move-out-yet

This type of person makes me question how we’re all adults here. This person simply has not adjusted to living away from home. It’s as if they expect their mum to always be there cleaning up after them. I’d really rather not be wading through chicken and cooked pasta on the way to the sink (you know who you are). It’s not that difficult to just wipe around the stove once you’ve finished cooking. Please.

The lovebirds

Often found during Freshers’ Week, the lovebirds enjoy each other’s company slightly too much. Sometimes this continues further into the semester, but other times it just ends suddenly. Then both people are forced to awkwardly interact while making their beans on toast. Either way it’s not the best idea. Just find other people instead; people that you don’t have to live with for a year. Don’t be one of these people. It just makes it awkward for everyone, and I’d rather not hear the giggling at 4am.

The complainer

Guilty as charged. I do realise how annoying this is, but it can’t be as bad as leaving raw meat on the floor next to the bin. Someone has to keep that kind of behaviour in check. I’m usually far too scared to actually say anything though, so I just stay quiet. It may be just our kitchen, but 10 people sharing one freezer is just not practical. My onion rings are depleting by the day. My one tip: label EVERYTHING. Even if you think no one else will use it, it’s better safe than sorry.

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