A complete guide to Leeds Uni halls stereotypes

Tannery is Topman if Topman was a hall

4 years ago

So, you’re applying to Leeds Uni as an innocent fresher. Your eyes are full of hope and sparkle. But there’s one problem. Which hall do you pick?

It feels nearly impossible to know which hall will be right for you and then, to make matters worse, once you’ve made you’re choice, there’s no guarantee that’s the hall you’ll get assigned.

That’s right, which hall you get allocated is a complete lottery, and unfortunately, in this game there are always winners and losers.

But don’t worry, we’re on hand to give you all the information you’ll need on the stereotypes associated with the most iconic halls on campus.

Charles Morris

Congratulations! You’ve made it to the top of the feudal system. Now all you need to do is bag those those edgy Leeds garms that you’ll claim to have bought from a charity shop (but have actually copped for an extortionate price in Urban) and you’re good to go.

Don’t worry though, Daddy will fund you’re shopping needs, the maintenance of your poorly dyed blonde hair and your new-found ket habit.

Covid may have robbed you of your catered services this year, but it doesn’t matter because spending £20 a night on a takeaway seems reasonable to you, right?

The Tannery

Tannery is Topman if Topman was a hall.

You’ve played it safe. You don’t mind the trek from campus because you’ll spend most of your time singing ABBA karaoke and One direction in someone else’s kitchen for the whole year. Even if you could go to clubs, you’d defo prefer not to, because you claim you don’t need them to have a good time.

James Baillee

You’re probably pretty chill, not snobby enough for the “nice halls”, but have enough social standing not to apply to “the one overlooking the graveyard” (Henry Price, ew).

Also, there’s always a sesh there, right? Obviously no one can go clubbing at the moment, so desperate freshers from “posh” halls resort to you for their entertainment- that manky sofa and zoot will have to do (before they go to sleep in their swanky bedrooms elsewhere)!

CitySide and Central Village

You’re a creature of comfort. The thought of sharing toilets makes your skin crawl and the clinical hospital like corridors don’t bother you because you have a pristine en-suite and double bed to cosy up in.

You’d probably like Charles Morris too, but you can’t be arsed with all the posh, tory rugby boys. You like to think you’re down with the poor people but in reality you can’t live without the luxury. You’re doing good. Not a bad place to be locked up in during a pandemic. Also you’re smashing it with the corona-themed post-it art. Keep it up guys.

Lyddon

I’m truly sorry for you. You probably applied for Charles Morris but didn’t get in, so now you’re stuck in a grotty annex with about three other people. Wave goodbye to your social life.

You’ll probably come across farming boys in Chelsea boots and have a bit of a laugh in a kitchen that was built in the Victorian times. But that’s literally it. If you test positive for corona, ABORT MISSION AND GO BACK TO YOUR ESTATES IN THE COUNTRYSIDE!

Oxley

Let’s be honest, Are you even in Leeds?

Remember when you would scramble to join the group chats in the months leading up to Uni? Oxley was that hall everyone would cry about being allocated. “OMG no way they’ve given me Oxley!!!!” *cries*

Devonshire

Devs was the Charles Morris of Leeds in the like, 80s? Our parents went there, and it was “the best place to be”. The novelty of pony club and black-tie dinners soon wears off…. how time changes.