What college and course would the Great British Bake Off Stars pick?

Now, I know we all want Saku at our college but unfortunately we can’t all be so lucky…

Bake Off season is upon us. In fact, we are already heading into week six! It almost feels like Bake Off weeks pass quicker than Cambridge weeks. However, five hours of GBBO content has given me enough time to assess this year’s bakers and do what Cambridge students do best: subject them to Cambridge stereotypes. I admit, Cambridge is probably not the best uni for any passionate baker, there’s not a lot you can do without an oven and those air fryer recipes never quite work the same. But, if these bakers were to be Cambridge students these are the colleges and courses I think they would pick.

Here’s a reminder of this year’s 12 bakers:

Abbi – Natsci at Christ’s

A proud forager makes Abbi a perfect NatSci or to be more precise, a PlantSci. Only a Bio NatSci would forage their own wild garlic and nettle to bake with. Plus she would fit in perfectly at Christ’s surrounded by other overachievers. I mean who really needs to do nine strands for the plaited bread showstopper?

Amos – Education at Pembroke

As a self-confessed film and theatre enthusiast, education is the perfect fit for Amos and where else to study it than at Pembroke, home to the largest college drama society in Cambridge?

Cristy – MML at Selwyn

Let’s be honest, given the opportunity Cristy would be a Sidge Girlie. I can definitely see Crushbridge potential in her. MML and Selwyn seem like the perfect combination for Cristy to spend the most time at Sidge as possible.

Rowan – English at Trinity College

Now if I’ve learnt anything from this series of Bake Off it’s that Rowan cannot do maths. So, that was a definite no from the start. However, as an English literature student at the University of York, he made my decision for me. I knew it had to be a grand college for an extravagant baker and Trinity College seems apt for someone who bakes themselves a three-tier, 12-layer wedding cake for their 21st birthday.

Dan – Engineering at Fitzwilliam

Civil Engineer by trade makes engineering the obvious choice for Dan. In his free time, Dan likes playing football. So, Cambridge’s top sporting college, Fitzwilliam, seems like the perfect choice.

Saku – Vet Medicine at Downing

Downing is the college fortunate enough to be blessed with the nation’s favourite. She also won over the judges with her impressive turtle cake. I don’t know how often vet meds deal with turtles but she’s clearly good with animals. Now, it might just be the people I talk to but everyone seems to love Downing so, a popular college for a popular woman.

Dana – Law at Tit Hall

Unfortunately for Dana, she’s been burdened with law but only Dana has the level of positivity needed to survive those land law lectures (trust me, I’m a landec, I know). She also said that she “loves a semi-naked cake with neat lines, pretty piping and minimalist decoration”. That sounds like Tit Hall in a cake to me.

Josh – NatSci at St. John’s

This was no tough decision. Josh is a postdoctoral researcher in chemistry so he can be the second NatSci of the group. What was a much more difficult decision was assigning him to St. John’s. Although he doesn’t look like your typical Redboy, he is a “keen rugby player” so, John’s it is.

Keith – Maths at Peterhouse

Keith is a Chartered Accountant so you can’t really go wrong with maths. Well, I guess you can…I often do…but I have faith that Keith would be okay. Now, it may seem a little harsh giving the oldest baker the oldest college but as a man who likes traditional bakes, I didn’t want to deprive him of a traditional college.

Matty – History at Emmanuel

A Cambridgeshire boy at heart, Matty hasn’t ventured far from home. He also looks like a man who wouldn’t want to venture far from Revs so I’ve blessed him with Emmanuel for prime access to Rumboogie. Why history? You might ask. Well, doesn’t he just look like a guy who gets reading weeks?

Nicky – Anglo Saxon Norse and Celtic Studies at Homerton

Somebody had to do it and I don’t think there’s a better candidate than someone who names their dog “Haggis”. She seems bubbly, sweet and all-round great fun which sounds like a great fit for “Cambridge’s Friendliest College”, Homerton.

Tasha – Classics at Newnham

Her impressive Medusa plaited bread showstopper was the only evidence I needed to convince myself she must have a passion for Greek mythology. She also seems like a girls girl so Newnham seems ideal.

Prue Leith – Architecture at Clare

A little bit of research told me that Prue couldn’t stick to any particular course for long but she did have a brief stint in architecture. Her impeccable style for an 83-year-old shows she’s got an eye for detail and design so, in another life I think she could have been a great architect. Her other defining trait of course is her love for booze, particularly in bakes, so Clare Cellars seems like her perfect hangout spot.

Paul Hollywood – PBS at Homerton

I know, it feels criminal to not bless central Cambridge with Paul Hollywood’s presence but with Homerton being home to a bread society, I can’t think of a better college for the king of bread. Plus, only someone who studies psychology should have the ability to psych out the bakers. With those bright blue eyes and the hope of a handshake, he’s already a natural at messing with people’s brains.

Feature image credit: YouTube

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