Live-tweeting my Valentine’s Day

9.00: Oh my god, why did I drink so much wine last night?

9.15: Snooze the alarm.

9.20: Snooze the alarm.

9.25: Snooze the alarm.

9.30: Turn the alarm off.

11.00: Oh shit.

11.01: Remember with sadness it's Valentine's Day and I'm alone for the 20th year in a row. Great.

11.02: Whatever, it's fine, I'm not actually bothered. Shall I tweet "I prefer pancake day anyway"? Type out tweet. Nah.

11.03: Message group chat "Merry Valentines Day" instead. At least we're all alone. Alone together…therefore, not alone. Am I right? I'm right.

11.40: Check the Porters' Lodge on my way through. No surprise cards. I don't care.

11.41: "Ahhh! Where are the flowers in your pidge on this fine morning?" Classic porter banter. Cheers for reminding me.

11.45: Walking to lectures. Oh my god, wtf it is so windy. Turns direction. Oh brilliant.

11.46: Wow I really hope the lecturer is fit today – a Valentine's treat from the English fac.

11.47: OH my god, my flask is leaking.

11.50: Ha! I'm like one of those signs, "love smells like freshly ground coffee". I smell like love today. Fitting. Lol.

12.05: Ok the lecturer is old. But, I don't think I'd say no if I was 50.

1.45: Back to college. HOW HAVE I CHANGED DIRECTIONS AND YET THE WIND IS STILL NOT GOING IN THE IDEAL DIRECTION FOR MY HAIR?

2.00: Okay, time for essay, followed by essay, followed by essay.

3.25: Really shouldn't have had so much wine last night.

4.15: Bored.

4.57: Bored and alone.

5.00: Ooooo photo booth.

6.43: Ok, essay done. I now have 17 minutes to eat dinner and get to the Picturehouse… which is a 20 minute walk away.

6.38: Dinner in a polystyrene box from the buttery. It's not quite a candlelit Valentine's dinner, but it's actually even faster service than McDonald's.

6.43: Need to eat fast.

6.45: Oh my god, I have indigestion.

6.51: Slow jog to the Picturehouse. Oh, great. Rain too.

6.59: Going to be late for the film. I wonder if my Dos will be there, since she bought tickets for the college? Wait, does that make my Dos my Valentine? Kill me now.

7.06: Phew, hasn't started yet. Sorry, sorry, can I just squeeze past? Whoops, sorry, oh sorry. Made it.

8.30: Interval. I am such a classic English student. I don't wanna think what I'm thinking…but I've thought it now. Yes, Shakespeare has, in fact, saved my Valentine's Day.

9.15: Oh look, there's my Dos! Oooo and she's with her husband, wow Shakespeare play on Valentine's day, they've nailed it. #goals

9.30: Ah yes! I've been meaning to see the lights show, I'm so glad it's still on! Even more romance for me, myself, and I.

10.15: Wine time.

10.30: Should I go out?

10.32: Nah

10.34: Could be fun though?

10.37: No.

10.45: Yes, let's go.

10.50: I really shouldn't.

10.55: One more glass… then we'll see. You never know, I still might be yet to find my Valentine in Fez smoking area.