Queen’s is the best university in the whole damn world

Since A-Level students across the country have recently opened letters which have determined whether or not their parents now think of them as failures – we should take some time as present, past and potential Queen’s University Belfast students to appreciate our glorious university in all her splendour.

For the uninformed among you, QUB is the best university in the UK and Ireland. Yeah, Trinity College Dublin, you heard me.

U.I.L.F.

Now we all know looks aren’t everything, but no one is going to invite you over for ‘netflix and chill’ because they want to get your opinion on 12th century French literature.

QUB’s knockout good looks aren’t a secret. The university has repeatedly made the ‘QS Top Universities Top 10 most beautiful UK universities’ list. What may surprise you though, is that this little minx is one of the ten oldest universities in the UK too.

Effectively, QUB is the Jennifer Lopez of Universities – you know she’s probably older than your mum, but you’d still definitely give her one.

Attractiveness aside, it’s important not just to judge a book by its cover, but QUB is a double threat with both beauty and brains.

A member of the prestigious Russell Group and with numerous courses ranking in the top 10 in the UK, Queen’s ain’t just a pretty face.

Most notably, QUB has also just been included in the Higher Education Statistics Agency Top 10 for research intensity in the UK. Joining the ranks of Oxbridge and Imperial, Queen’s is like a supermodel with genius IQ who is also completely down to earth and always up for a mad one.

Most Affordable University in the UK 

As Davey Cameron and the rest of the Eton Alumni club, more commonly known as ‘The Tories’, prepare to financially sodomise you for even considering going to university, Belfast might well be the answer to your prayers.

Not only are you able to separate yourself from those Bullingdon club rejects with a body of water, now Natwest have declared Belfast to be the most economical city in UK to study in.

The 2015 Student Living Index, spoke to around 2,500 of us to see what they were spending their time and money on.

They looked at how much we spent on things like rent, socialising, fitness, and hobbies.

Belfast came out on top of the 25 student cities in the survey. This means that by living here you’ll have more money to spend on ‘study materials’.

Halls is where the heart is

Just because Belfast is the cheapest city to live in, don’t think this reflects on the quality of your halls. Oh no.

In a long line of Top 10s this year, QUB has also featured in The Telegraph’s Top 10 universities for accommodation 2015.

With rooms from as cheap as £69 per week all the way up to posh one bedroom apartments for £155 per week – QUB has got you sorted no matter your budget.

What’s the Craic?

Pronounced “crack” but nothing to do with cocaine, apply to Leeds if that’s your thing, Craic comes from the Irish slang term that roughly translates as fun or banter.

Forget the rankings for research, employability and student satisfaction; QUB is the No. 1 university in the UK for the most important metric – craic.

With the larger alcohol measures, Game of Thrones cast members casually walking around and a national bank holiday dedicated to drinking, well technically to Saint Patrick, the Northern Irish are born with a first class degree in having a laugh.

With a wealth of pubs, clubs and restaurants – there’s never a dull moment in Belfast. No surprise, then, that Belfast was recently featured on Snapchat’s worldwide ‘Life’ story.

Holylands

Worth a mention all of their own, The Holylands is an area beside the main university campus which a large number of students choose to call their home.

The neighbourhood gets its title from the names of its’ streets, which are named after various biblical locations in the Middle East. The streets are just like their namesakes out East, that is if you replace three thousand years of political tension with three thousand drunk students.

The Holylands are Queen’s’ version of Disneyland, but with nightly house parties instead of overpriced merry-go-rounds.

Liam Neeson

And, saving the best for last, did you know Liam Neeson went here?

If you accept your offer for Queen’s now that’ll be the end of it. I will not look for you, I will not pursue you, but if you don’t, I will look for you, I will find you and I will kill you make you realise that you’ve made a terrible mistake.