Swifties, proceed with caution: Here’s the worst song on every Taylor Swift album

I am a card carrying die hard Swiftie, and will be until I die. I will be belting my tits off at the Eras Tour to every single song – but that does not mean that every song on every Taylor Swift album is good. Sometimes, there’s an absolute STINKER. With that in mind and with my latest Taylor Swift album binge coming to an end, may I present to you the worst song on every album by her.

Taylor Swift – Invisible

This is, pretty objectively, the worst Taylor Swift album – and on it, the worst track is Invisible. Why? Girl, the vocals. The shrill, strained chorus! Hell on earth. Will assumingly be rectified when we get Taylor Swift (Taylor’s Version) because Tay’s vocals are a million times better now.

Fearless – The Best Day

I found choosing a worst song on Fearless quite hard, actually – it’s one of her most consistent albums across the board. But in last place, I’m putting The Best Day. The melody is quite sweet but for Taylor Swift the lyrics are pretty basic. With all due respect, I’m not arsed about your nice day.

Speak Now – Superman

Erm, “I watch superman fly away / You’ve got a busy day today / Go save the world, I’ll be around / And I watch superman fly away”. Written by one of the greatest songwriters of all time, by the way. Hate.

Red – Stay Stay Stay

Have a particularly vivid memory of this song playing in New Look once whilst I waited for my mum to shop. The store was packed and the song sounded so grating, so EVIL, that I’ve never forgiven it. A cursed and insufferable melody.

1989 – Bad Blood

Hard to pick a truly shit song on what is a pop bible in anyone with taste’s eyes, but the worst Taylor Swift song on this album is Bad Blood. I hovered over Shake It Off, but actually think the lead single is excellent bubblegum pop and even if it’s not always for me, Bad Blood is objectively the worst here. Just a bit half arsed. Medium pop, and simply written.

Reputation – This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things

I love Reputation with all my heart and soul, but it has two evil songs: Gorgeous, and this mess. This one is marginally worse. I feel like this is what people who hate Taylor Swift think all her music sounds like. So annoying.

Lover – ME!

Not just the scourge of Lover, but the biggest misstep of her entire career.

Folklore – Epiphany

Hard to pick a worst song on the best Taylor Swift album ever, but if you force me to do such a thing I’m going with Epiphany. Out of them all, it’s this one that makes me least happy and reminds me of a Covid time I’d just rather not think about.

Evermore – Closure

I love Evermore as much as I love Folklore, pretty much. Nothing stands in the way of me and the ‘More sisters! If I have to pick a worst it’s Closure, for that racket beat that never feels quite as good as it should.

Fearless (Taylor’s Version) – The Other Side of the Door

I mostly love all the Vault tracks on her first rerelease, but this one just is the least memorable for me. I know this one was on the original Deluxe Fearless but it’s my choices and here we are. Argue amongst yourselves, cheers.

Red (Taylor’s Version) – Run

Red (Taylor’s Version) has the best Vault tracks of any of the rerecordings, but I do think Run is the least special. It’s not because of Ed Sheeran – I weirdly quite like Everything Has Changed – but just gets outwowed by the other heavy hitters in the Vault tracklist.

Midnights – Vigilante Shit

HATE this song. So cringe, so annoying, so faux bad bitch. Like a Reputation leftover but not in a good, Delicate way – in a hell on earth This Is Why We Can’t Have Nice Things sort of way. Skip.

Speak Now (Taylor’s Version) – When Emma Falls In Love

Speak Now is my least favourite Taylor’s Version, mostly because it has the worst Vault tracks. Especially the twee When Emma Falls In Love, which I cannot stomach.

1989 (Taylor’s Version) – Suburban Legends

Most of the Vault tracks on this sound more Midnights than 1989, which is to its detriment. The biggest culprit is Suburban Legends which I think is unmemorable and painfully underwritten. “Tick tock on the clock, I pass down your block”? We’re better than this, Taylor.

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Related stories recommended by this writer:

• All the new Vault songs on Taylor Swift’s 1989 (Taylor’s Version), ranked from worst to best

• Inside the wild theory that 1989 is about Taylor Swift and Harry Styles doing a hit and run

• Ranking every song on 1989 by Taylor Swift, in honour of the Taylor’s Version announcement