Clubbers of the week: Freshers’ Edition

Chaos returns to York

A new term is upon us and we’ve all returned to impossibly packed out clubs, and us third years have realized we are now utterly irrelevant. But as the sun rises in the east and sets in the west, every year a new group of innocent freshers descend on this fine city and make absolute tits of themselves.

Many freshers’ week veterans were also keen not to miss out on the fun showing you don’t have to be 18 to get embarrassingly loose.

Hotties of the week

Freshers’ week is for terrible fancy dress, but we’ll let you off

Runners Up

Undisputed best dressed of the week

Hat’s off to these lads

Creep of the week

Those come to bed eyes

Hero of the week

This is so #uni

Best fingering technique of the week

Satisfaction guaranteed

Worst fingering technique of the week

Not sure that’s how it’s done

Mystery floating arm of the week

I have so many questions

Inappropriate shirt unbuttoning

You’re not Peter Andre mate

Most unnecessary jewelry 

Straight off ASOS Marketplace

“Mum, but you told me to call you during freshers”

There will be a lot of explaining tomorrow

Intervention of the week

“Pete, you need to stop dabbing”

Quagmire lookalike of the week


Illuminating fart of the week

Classic smelly Langwith

Here’s someone who has just won and then wasted a lifetime supply of glitter

He’ll be finding glitter everywhere for weeks

Most serious allergic reaction to females of the week

I hope he brought his epipen

Over-eager marriage proposal of the week

“Not with that hair Stephen”

*She’s touching my willy, but stay calm*

No one will know

VK promoter of the week

“Excuse me, certified legend coming through”

Indoor sunburn of the week

He really should have used factor 50

And here’s a photo not to show your Mum

Probably best to de-tag this one