These are the 12 Newcastle Uni moments which shouldn’t be embarrassing but they really are

Nothing worse than seeing Hinge matches on campus

4 hours ago

As a well-seasoned Newcastle Uni student entering my final year, I feel I have expert opinions and experiences in embarrassing myself in a Class A category. Both drunk and sober, the stories I have to tell from my time at uni are nothing short of diabolical. To anyone reading this, let’s find solidarity in our embarrassment.

1. Dressing up for sports night

As someone who chooses not to dabble in the sports (the activity side of it anyways) I’m forever taken aback by the outfits I see running for the metro on a Wednesday night. I’ve witnessed, babies, school girls (controversial), fruits and minions – just to name a few. No amount of alcohol or people alike could persuade me to join in at the best of times. The people who put themselves through that week in and week out, both scare and amaze me – I love your confidence x

2. Going to the local shop

Arguably worse than the walk of shame, it takes a lot of courage to buy a sweet treat by yourself in Jesmond Tesco. Don’t get me started on seeing anyone and everyone you’d rather not see. The cesspit of snog, marry, avoid – mostly avoid.

3. Being out of breath walking to uni

Feeling like I need a breathalyzer for a 20 minute walk is frightening. It’s even more embarrassing especially because I go to the gym multiple times a week, clearly not paying off is it?

4. Getting caught trying to hide your drinks from the bouncers

After barely surviving endless rounds of humbling drinking games at pres, I’ll make a questionable concoction of journey juice to avoid paying for some overpriced trebs. But after two years, I’m still not quite sure if it’s worth the embarrassment of watching the bouncers pour it out right before your eyes if you’re unlucky enough to get caught – shout out to me and my housemate.

5. Falling down the club stairs

No matter how little I’ve had to drink I’ll somehow always find myself stumbling down a set of stairs in the club. As humbling as it may be in the moment, at least you’re making memories for your mates to inevitably haunt you with for the rest of the year.

6. Getting a seat in the library

As if finding the motivation to drag yourself to the library (usually hungover) wasn’t bad enough, the struggle to actually find a seat is massively degrading. By the time you manage to secure a spot, your course mates will no doubt invite you for a cheeky coffee break anyway. Good luck finishing that never ending 3000 word essay in one night.

7. Deleted scenes from the hangover

It’s all fun and games being the digital camera friend until it’s 8am and you’ve woken up with an empty bank account, a half eaten sausage roll and the group chat begging you for last nights pictures. The debrief is unbeatable.

8. Unhinged trips to A&E

Ending up in A&E on Halloween has to be some sort of sick joke. However, I am at fault for ignoring my obvious kidney infection and proceeding to only get it checked after I couldn’t walk. Live, laugh, love, lazy. I will not be providing photographic evidence for this…

9. Spotting hinge matches on campus

You know it’s bad when the moment you step foot on campus it feels like real life Where’s Wally? Do we actually know each other or did you just sent me a rose on Hinge at 1am in Freshers Week?

10. Getting turned away from club queues

Get used to intently asking how the bouncers how their day was, with a wide smile, in the hopes of actually making it inside the club. If you’re planning on having a big night don’t make the rookie mistake of turning up without a ticket…

11. Cycle lanes in Jesmond

Whether it’s a morning stroll to a lecture or a much needed mental health walk, there’s nothing worse than walking down the infamous cycle lane through Jesmond. Prepare to jump out of your skin every 5 minutes while you’re debriefing with your housemate from the night before.

Image via Google Maps

12. Moving into your uni house

There’s nothing quite undignified like moving into your house at uni. Looking disheveled going back and forth from the car as onlookers make awkward eye contact with you as you proceed to drop underwear out of a bag – this may or may not be a personal experience.