Things every UCL Student House Must Have

10 things that should grace the rooms of all UCL Students.


1. An ‘I Hate Kings’ Mug

Isn’t it fun having rivals?! Yeah, let’s hate people because someone else told us that we should and they stole a lion or a preserved human head or something. Nothing bad has ever come of that in the history of the world ever.

2. A Malcolm Grant bed spread 

So you can dream about him and that glorious tash even when he’s gone…

3. A Communist Flag

Because we’re all bloody socialists. VIVE LA REVOLUTION!

4. A Wine Cellar

Because we’re actually more middle-class than my tweed jacket can handle.

5. A gigantic poster reminding you of what you had to change your password to.

Because computers hate us and want to take over the world by making us try to remember 8#[email protected]”ED-_

6. Another massive poster reminding you to remember your student card.

Because the security people hate us and are trying to take over the world by being not letting you anywhere without it.

7. Your own personal Jeremy Bentham

Or is it just the landlord’s own mummified 19th century freakshow? Always read a contract thoroughly.

8. The UCLU Naked Sports Calendar 

Why wouldn’t you want to gander at your peers in their most natural state/flick through to try and find that one you hooked up with at The Roxy last Wednesday.

9. Artsy wallpaper covered in “Cuncti adsint meritaque expectant praemia palmae”

It’s our motto, you flange. Hehehe cuncti.

10. A Tab poster.

Because we can’t afford advertising.