Which caterpillar cake is your first year halls?

With all the commotion that caterpillar cakes caused earlier in the year, the student population remains divided into starkly different camps of Colins, Cuthberts and Clydes.

Like choosing where to buy your caterpillar cake, where you live in first year can determine a lot about the rest of your uni life. Think of this article as the caterpillar cake shaped answer to astrology.

Colin (M&S): Devonshire

Despite not being the oldest accommodation, Devonshire shares the sense of regality that the M&S Colin the Caterpillar cake has. Its grand exterior (converted Victoria mansion houses) and white chocolate balls also add the slight pretentiousness required of M&S to indirect other supermarkets on their website. After all, this is not just a hall, this is Devonshire Hall.

Cuthbert (ALDI): James Baillie and Henry Price

James Baillie and Henry Price reside in the different but equally loved student suburbs of Headingley and Hyde Park respectively. The uniqueness, affordability and lively areas that these accommodations are situated in make them the perfect Cuthberts of the caterpillar cake world.

Like these halls, Cuthbert has all the chocolatey flavour and caterpillar-appeal of the original Colin, but at far more affordable price. The popularity ALDI’s Twitter gained throughout its legal row with M&S can perhaps be likened to how oversubscribed these two halls are.

Due to Cuthbert’s rising popularity, ALDI restocked it amidst the legal battle, donating all profits to the Teenage Cancer Trust. If that’s not the feel-good, stick-it-to-the-man vibes of Leeds University then I don’t know what is.

Calli (Tesco): Cityside and Central Village

If I’m being honest, Cityside and Central Village are only Callis because the halls are right next to the Tesco Express. Also, like Calli, these halls are a bit irrelevant. Very close to campus though so at least you’ll be at all your 9ams.

Cecil (Waitrose): Charles Morris

You’re back from your gap-yah, and now that you’ve found yourself, it’s time to find all the others like you. Grab your North Face puffer and your flares, it’s time to hit Charles Morris. Like other Waitrose fans, you’re a bit of a Tory and you definitely have an uncle named Cecil, so it’s only appropriate that this is your caterpillar cake.

Students at Charles Morris like their Cecil the Caterpillar Cake served with a sprinkling of ket, and a tall matcha green tea frappuccino.

Charlie (Co-Op): Lyddon

Lyddon Hall is one of the closest accommodations to the student’s union, which is home to the infamously overpriced Co-Op. Those of you unfortunate enough to do a weekly shop at the Co-Op will find yourself waiting awkwardly at the self-checkout every time you try to purchase alcohol, unfortunately, you’ll need a lot of it as you live in a run-down victorian building with dodgy heating.

Lyddon Hall is described as having a “quirky character” on the University website and perhaps, now that Co-Op have renamed Charlie, as a ‘Curious Caterpillar Cake’, this is the closest accommodation-cake match so far.

Clyde (ASDA): The Tannery, Sentinel Towers

Reliable, affordable and en-suite – these two neighbouring halls are the epitome of taking the middle-ground. They are a good distance from both the campus and the city and have the affordability and convenience you would expect of a store like ASDA. Yes, it’s average and kind of boring, but so is Clyde.

Wiggles (Sainsbury’s): Oxley

Not a proper caterpillar cake if your name doesn’t start with C, not a proper university accommodation if you’re nowhere near campus.

Mini Caterpillars: Other (Leodis, Carr Mills, etc)

My first year hall was actually Carr Mills, but there’s not many stereotypes you can build off a typical block of flats. I’m sure there are many more halls like these scattered across Leeds, accomodating all the students that got rejected from Henry Price, so I’ve grouped them all as a pack of mini Colin the caterpillar cakes. Your halls may be nice but don’t quite have the relevance required to be a full-length caterpillar cake.

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