Which emoji is your uni?
You’d be gutted if it was the poo
Choosing the right emoji is like choosing a university. It should take a little bit of thought and preparation, and your choice says a lot about you as a person.
Now, it’s time we finally asked the big question. What university corresponds to what emoji?
Welcome to Leeds, what can I get you? A bag of mephedrone or some dub you can step to?
A uni synonymous with shitloads of K and pingers, the pill emoji is so Leeds.
Apparently Sussex is the most left wing uni of us all, so nothing represents its love of protest more than a fist bump skywards for solidarity.
According to a survery, the south coast shaggers at Brighton are the most sexually active of all unis. So also fisting.
On asking two Duzza students which emoji they thought encapsulated their uni I received the reply “I’m not really a user of emojis so I don’t really know what their implications are.”
It’s the 21st Century Durham. Get with it.
As kings of sport, it would have been easy to give Luffa the bicep emoji and make a joke about their guns.
But realistically, their sports prowess pales in comparison to tales of their awful initiations. Some of them (lots of them) may involve eating poo.
York are officially the booziest uni in the UK so this emoji will have been sent round more than one #squad in that fine city.
To be fair though, what else is there to do in York but drink?
The second oldest uni in the country, Cambridge doesn’t quite wear the crown but considering that it’s classy as fuck, it wears a mighty fine top hat.
They also hate the crown (Oxford) as Cambridge backed Cromwell and the Roundheads in the English Civil War.
You fancy bastards at Oxford live in the crown jewel of higher education. Since they’re the older than Cambridge, they’re more than entitled to the crown emoji.
Just in case they weren’t feeling pleased enough with themselves already.
Locked away in their labs more than Walter White, if any uni knows how to operate one of these things, it’s Imperial.
Thea Martin, 2nd Politics student says Notts is super “wavey.” So this emoji is more than fitting.
Plus they all really love going to Ocean.
Edinburgh, you have a golf course and according to Politics and Philosophy fresher Cora Catford, “Everyone plays it”.
Plus you’re pretty rah and probably all wear those red golf trousers.
Geeks are cool. UCL comes with a reputation for academic achievement, so they’re proud to be nerdy.
Too proud if anything.
Bristol’s freshers probably all learnt this symbol while on a really spiritual trip to Laos on their Gap Yah.
A third yeah who would rather remain anonymous said you’re “all pretty chill but knobby in that Goa pant edgy kinda way”.
Pretty much sums it up.
There’s something about Manchester that’s a little extra-terrestrial.
It’s a combination of the edgy fashion sense and drugs which leaves revellers at the Warehouse Project looking like they come from another planet. Particularly in the eye department.
Since there isn’t an Alan Partridge emoji (yet) and you can actually get a farming degree from UEA, this pretty swish tractor is probably how most students get to campus.
They are pretty village.
Sheep outnumber ewe.This one is just a cheap shot about Welsh stereotypes, so I’ll just leave it here without ramming it down your throat.
Exeter is full of blonde daddy’s little princesses, just like this emoji. Look at those eyes, hypnotising her parents to send her more money.
A true Scouser wouldn’t be seen dead without heels on a night out in Liverpool.
Then later in the night, the shoe can also double up as something with which to break into a car.
What’s Bath famous for? Baths. Now let’s move on.
Surprisingly, people in Bath don’t really appreciate this joke.
LSE has some of the richest graduates in the country so obviously it’s a bag of money.
Their students have been kicking off about it being a “factory” recently – but they’re all still desperately trying to get Spring Week internships at Goldman Sachs.
Although associated with less healthy foods – deep fried Mars bar anyone? – Glasgow has a strong claim to being the vegan capital of Britain.
Gotta love the Aubergines.
Trent doesn’t take itself too seriously. It’s a poly, but it’s sassy and it doesn’t give a fuck.
The quintessential Trent girl may not be as intellectual as her wavy friends at Nottingham, but she’s having a good time, and that’s all that matters really isn’t it?
Sorry about your A-levels.
This is the skull of Leicester’s underground monarch Richard III.
According to Eniola Okuyedi, a History and Politics second year at Leicester: “Everyone’s always going on about Richard III being found in the car park.”
Sorry Leicester, but we know literally nothing else about you.
The evil twin of Newcastle, Northumbria are the cheeky devils of the North East.
Fresher Max Devlin says “Northumbria students get up to mischief and have fun while doing it.”
This emoji is because Queen’s is really fun – it’s da bomb.
And yes, because Belfast has a lot of these.
Running alongside sporty Luffa, Beckett make us other unis feel like the last kid to be picked in PE.
Try to have a conversation with a Beckett student that doesn’t reference ruggers at least once. Just try it.
It can’t be done.
Stirling University killed 104,475 fish in 2012 in the name of animal research.
It’s fucking hilly.
Barely a week goes by without a chair-related scandal from Plymouth.
Turns out their Vice Chancellor Wendy Purcell just really likes buying fancy seats.
Reading University is fire – no literally, they set things on fire quite a lot in their halls, from cornish pasties to hairdryers.