Which type of Edinburgh Uni smoker are you?

You probably vape


Smokers at uni are like their own army. They rely on each other in many ways, whether it being coordinating when they have a smoke, or whatever else, you will often find them in numbers.

However, it’s not all one happy family, there are many different types of smokers that you’ll see at uni. Here are some of the most common ones.

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The Fresher

The sweet and innocent fresher, who is slightly homesick and desperately trying to find a group of friends to cling onto in order to help them make it through Freshers.

Some freshers, in order to try and master their uni look early on, will head out to the shops with the money that their mum has lent them until their loan comes in and buy themselves twenty of “whatever is cheapest” and think nothing of it.

Smoke and that mysterious stare make one mysterious man

But, soon enough they will find themselves there on a daily basis topping up their rations that they swore to themselves would only be bought as more of a “social thing”.

Also, in freshers, no matter what student halls you’re in, you’ll always see the same person outside having a cig every time you leave the building. Literally at any time. They will be there. It’s similar to the clan of people you’ll always see in front of the library in their cohorts. It really is a popular social spot on most campuses.

The Social Smoker

These will often be seen loitering around the smoking areas of night clubs pestering talking to roughly six to eight random folk in order to get their fix.

There are the social smokers who are merely just telling themselves that they are social smokers in order to make themselves feel better about it.

But, there are also the ones who, after a few vodka and cokes, will take two drags from the Marlboro Gold that they crashed from the 36 year-old muscle-man in the skimpy blazer and an almost buttonless shirt. This act would be carried out all in the name of impressing the person they were trying to chat up in the club that night.

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The Menthol Smoker

This is the greatest area of controversy in the university smoking community – questions that are regularly raised go something like “why bother?”

But, for many others they are the go-to option, and there was a great deal of relief when the decision was made after the Brexit referendum to still continue selling them in the UK. For menthol smokers, their cigarette is their substitute for Listerine.

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The Good, The Bad and the Shit Rollers

The level of rolling-ability can vary dramatically from person to person, and it can be hard to watch sometimes. There’s nothing worse than when you see someone whipping out their rolling machine in the queue for the club. If you find yourself doing that – go home.

But of course, it’s not all bad, there are the people who have been doing it since they were 12 and could do it with their toes if they absolutely had to and they still would not even have to stop and think it through.

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You’ll see those rollers in the corners of smoking areas with their cap on, their shell jacket and some Nike trainers, with the roll-up being a mere accessory they have in order to complete their ‘roadman’ look.

You’ll often see an art student preparing their roll-up five minutes before the end of their lecture just so they can have it in their mouth as soon as they are outside the building and the fresh air hits them.

The Vaper

If you fall into this category, then that’s a shame. Vaping is now more of a sport than it is a way of quitting smoking – although others use it as an alternative but then find themselves on that more than they would be on the real thing.

You can bet your bottom dollar that you flick through a club photo album and see people posing with their vape, trying to show off their skills as best as they can (the bigger the cloud, the better you are). Let’s be serious, it’s not a great look. Sorry folks.

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Photo credits

Flare: Neil Stewart Photography

FLY Festival (Open Air)

Temple: Ben Glasgow: BGM Scotland