My reputation as a…?
Flo’s heard people talking about her recently, so she wants to talk about them.
Don’t know if anyone heard but I actually debated at the union the other day against Godfrey Bloom (I know, such a big dog). Afterwards I headed to 24’s to celebrate my new found career ambition as an after-dinner speaker, some of my friends came along. I mingled. All very jolly. My friends came over and said they had heard some boys talking about me.
“Oh what did they say?”
“They said you had a reputation.”
Of course! I’m notorious! Such a BNOC. A reputation for being the wittiest student around, perhaps? A reputation for my not half bad column, for being a damn fine edgy dresser, for being that girl from the Tab or Mrs FemSoc, for being a thoroughly middle of the road chemistry student, for being of above average height…
“They said you had a reputation for being a slut.”
I have many talents. Giving someone the eye in Klute just happens to be one of them and, some of the time, I quite enjoy sealing that deal. I’m sure many girls and guys out there feel the same. So how come the guys are players, studs, lads. And the girls are sluts, slags, hoes, whores.
I’m not the first to say it, it’s one of the classic feminist complaints, but I’m going to say it again, because clearly we’re not over it yet and it’s getting a bit old. So I’m going to keep complaining, until instead of having a reputation for being a slut, I have a reputation for being a massive lad.
The other day a friend at dinner remarked, “How would you feel if the person you married had been with 100 people?” Well I would feel honoured that they’d got to know that many people and decided that I was the best.
However, one talent I do not possess is “playing hard to get”. I’m terrible at it. If I want to sleep with you I will tell you. If I am playing hard to get, it’s genuinely because I haven’t quite made my mind up yet. At that point, I would recommend saying how you love cats, something about Germaine Greer’s criticism of the fourth wave in the New Statesman, and how much girls in trainers turn you on. Usually does it.
I hate the idea that girls have to pretend they don’t want it even when they do. And what’s even worse is it works! Both ways round, but better for women trying to pull men. I read a study, and there’s something really wrong with humans that we like it when people say no first. Kind of dodge, right?
How do you know when some is saying “no, try harder I’ll give in in a minute.” And when someone is saying “thanks, but no thanks”. Sometimes it’s obvious, sometimes it’s not.
I watched a documentary on whales the other day (also love marine life, if you’re trying to chat me up, there’s no joke in there I really like the sea.) and one particular species caught my eye. The female Southern Right Whale sleeps with loads of men in a massive orgy, and the bloke with biggest penis and balls flushes out all the other’s jizz and makes the baby. Awesome.
What can we do until we evolve to be like the Southern Right Whale? Well I’m on a one woman mission. I’m going to keep with my current tactic of being keen and open. Correcting people “No, she’s not a slut, she’s generous with her body”. Forgetting people’s pasts and focussing on the present.
Yeah baby. *winky face.*