Ranking the 2023 Love Islanders by who would steal the £50k in the final given the chance

It hasn’t been a thing for a while, but given the chance, there are definitely a few sneaky Islanders in the cast of Love Island 2023 who would steal the £50k prize fund from their partner in the final. This year more than ever it’s felt as though the couples aren’t all that secure, and any one of them could crumble at the last minute.

In previous seasons, the show has crowned the winning couple and then got them on the stage in one last moment to prove if they came on the show for love or money. Each person in the couple would be given an envelope – one containing the cash, the other containing nothing. The person with the prize then holds the power, and has to choose either split, or keep it for themselves.

When it was the twist, no Islander took the money. But would any from this year do it if they could? Here is a ranking of the Love Island 2023 cast, by who would be most likely to provide the drama and steal the £50k prize in the final.

10. Zach

Steal ranking: 0/10

Tbh, Zach is so laid back I’m not even sure if he knows there’s a prize fund. He’d probably be given the option to steal and have no idea what was going on. Molly is going to have to guide him through the final night, because I genuinely don’t think he ever has any clue what’s happening.

9. Lochan

Steal ranking: 0/10

Lochan is also getting a big fat 0. This man is too pure and too kind to steal anything, let alone 50 thousand smackers from our girl Whitney. Not going to happen!

8. Molly

Steal ranking: 2/10

Molly Marsh is no thief. She’s the kind of girl to step on a spider by accident and cry for the rest of the day. Molly simply couldn’t live with herself if she took the money – she’d have to release a 10 minute YouTube video the day she got back to the UK titled “I’m Sorry” and take it all back.

She gets a two just because she’s a musical theatre girlie, and all that said, musical theatre girlies can never 100 per cent be trusted in life.

7. Whitney

Steal ranking: 3/10

Look, I don’t for one minute think Whitney would take the money. This is Whitney who is the most savage woman the villa has ever homed, but still blushes and says “too shy” when Lochan even looks as her. She’s precious.

But you never know what kind of mood she might be in on the day of the final. I can picture her picking the envelope with the cash in, bursting out laughing, and not really knowing what she’s just done.

6. Jess

Steal ranking: 4/10

All you have to do is look at the pure face of our girl Jess and see it’s not the face of a woman who has it in her to steal the money. That being said, she does have a jokey side, and I could 100 per cent see her doing it for the jokes and then just splitting it with Sammy when they get home anyway.

5. Ella

Steal ranking: 5/10

Ella is straight down the middle with a 5/10 purely because she and Tyrique are the most unpredictable couple there’s ever been on this show. One minute they’re love’s young dream, next they’re fighting over something dumb just because they’re both so stubborn. It could go either way with these two, and I kinda love it for them.

4. Tyrique

Steal ranking: 6/10

Echoing my thoughts with Ella, Tyrique is also extremely unpredictable. He gets one extra point to Ella because he’s definitely more likely to take the money than she is. He’d be standing up on the stage next to Maya Jama and think if he took the money he’d look really cool and impress her. Cute.

3. Sammy

Steal ranking: 7/10

Sorry! I will never trust Sammy! I know him and Jess are official now, but he is sinister! Since someone on Twitter said Sammy looks like a man in a disguise I’ve never been able to look at him with any sort of faith.

2. Ella B

Steal ranking: 8/10

Ella B seems lovely, and I would actually hope she’d get the chance to nab the cash from underneath Mitch. It would be some sort of poetic justice for putting up with him all this time. I don’t for one second believe she and Mitch actually like each other, especially seeing as he’s just called her fake… days before the final.

1. Mitch

Steal ranking: 10/10

There is simply no way Mitch would do anything but take the £50k and RUN. He thrives on being messy Mitch, and would love the accolade of being the first ever Islander to take the cash.

He has literally hated everyone he’s been coupled up with apart from Molly, so he definitely feels as though he owes nobody anything. If for some bizarre reason we see Mitch crowned winner and he gets the option to take the prize, it’s happening!

P.S. ITV if you’re reading this, bring back this twist you cowards!

Love Island 2023 is on ITV2 and ITVX. For all the latest Love Island news and gossip and for the best memes and quizzes, like The Holy Church of Love Island on Facebook. 

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