We asked women how long they actually want a man to last in bed so you never disappoint again

Quite often when sex ends, right before the hunt for a spare sock or towel begins, men like to manically apologise for how quick it was all over. You’re all super sorry you’ve disappointed. You promise to do better next time. You say it’s never happened that fast before. That it’s just because we’re the most beautiful girl you’ve ever slept with. That we have a magic vagina, etc.

And, according to what’s being Googled, you’re all super confused about how long you’re meant to be lasting anyway. One of the top searched questions about shagging is “how long should sex last”. So, as an exercise in public service journalism, we’ve asked women how long they actually want men to last in bed, with explanations of their reasoning, and calculated the average time.

You are welcome x

Ok, how long should sex actually last?

We spoke to 10 women about how long they want a shag to last and the timings are seriously varied. Like, some people want no more than five minutes and others are asking for a massive hour and a half session. The timings literally change depending on whether it’s a weekday or a weekend.

But there’s one common theme. They all want to come:

Amy – Five minutes 

“As long as they’ve made me finish and there’s been foreplay.”

Poppy – Between nine and 27 minutes 

“Nine to three minutes on each: vigorous fingering, missionary, then doggy.”

Georgina – From ten to 30 minutes 

“Depends how riled up I am but 10-30 minutes so we can both come at the same time. I take longer so he needs to match.”

Holly – 17 minutes plus 

“Foreplay plus 17 minutes. Time for a few positions etc but doesn’t drag on too long.”

Phoebe – 20 minutes 

“As long as I get mine and I don’t get bored he can take as long as he likes. Surely, minimum 20 minutes though if we’re both into it.”

Lillian – 39 minutes 

“My gut said one hour but on second thoughts that might be a lot for her (🐱) so I’m going with 39 minutes.”

Scarlett – An hour 

“One session: 45 minutes – one hour please. Rest and recovery after.”

Áine – Up to 90 minutes 

“Either 25-30 minutes or an hour and a half. No in between. Like, weekday versus weekend.”

Alex – Until enough is enough 

“It’s less about the time and more about being able to read my ‘hurry up’ eyes.”

Gabriella – The limit does not exist 

“Until I finish because women come first xx”

So, what’s the average length of time girls want sex to last?

Obviously, you didn’t come to this article for nuance. You came for numbers. Cold hard figures you can work towards. So, when taking each women’s longest shagging duration preference, you’re looking to achieve an average of 37 minutes from beginning to end. If we’re in a quicker mood, 21 minutes.

But, according to research, most men actually only last about five minutes during the act itself. So, your main takeaway from this should be that foreplay is your very best friend.

Featured image credit via Unsplash 

• How to masturbate to the point of an orgasm – from girls, to girls

• 18 things girls want you to know about touching their boobs during sex

•  How to actually kiss a girl, by girls who are done with washing