This is what your summer drink of choice says about your general vibe
Never seen an ugly person drink an Aperol Spritz
The sun is out. The shorts are on. The park is calling your name. But what are you going to be drinking on this incredibly fine sunny day? We all have a signature drink that the minute the temperature goes over 18 degrees we run to the pub to order. Life is good, responsibilities aren’t a thing, and you can relax with an Aperol Spritz, Koppaberg, or Corona in hand. Not your vibe? That’s fair, we are all deeply attached to our summer drink. It’s rare to switch it up, you spend June, July, and August in a rather unhealthy relationship with that jug of Pimm’s, so it makes sense it holds a special place in your heart. But if Pimm’s is your go to beverage for the summer months, what does that actually say about you?
We’ve rounded up the most popular summer drinks you’ll be ordering in the pub or taking to the park and determining what it says about your overall vibe. And if you’re Dark Fruits fan, it’s not looking good.
This is what your summer drink of choice says about you:
Never seen an ugly person drink an Aperol Spritz. Gorgeous gorgeous girls and gays drink Aperol on the sunniest of days.
A true summer classic, if a little overdone. You don’t veer away from tradition, you love a picnic and probably hosted a Platty Jubes party, except you actually called it the Platinum Jubilee and shed a tear at the sight of the Queen on the balcony. Your boyfriend works in finance and you went straight from Exeter uni into a grad scheme. You live in Clapham but already have your eyes on a nice place in Surrey.
It’s giving rich single aunt vibes. Luxury but also chaotic. Anyone who can drink bottles of rosé in the pub on a hot day is guaranteed to be messy. Throwing up by 5pm, paying for everyone’s drinks, getting into arguments, and probably kicked out by the bouncer for falling asleep.
These are for people who don’t like any other alcohol, or are 16 and have just started drinking. More sugar than alcohol. If you drink Koppaberg you don’t have any teeth left. And if you do have any pearly whites remaining, their days are numbered.
You really think you did something paying the best part of seven English pounds for some kiwi and lime juice. Well, let me tell you, you didn’t. You were swindled!
Strongbow Dark Fruits
You’re in the local park, not Leeds Fest. Have a day off.
Corona/ Sol/ Desperado
You are mysterious and everyone is enamoured with you. There is nothing sexier than seeing someone basking in the sun sipping one of these Mexican tinged lagers. I can only dream to have the chill vibes you radiate in spadeloads.
Brewdog drinkers had their hype in 2016 and now anyone who orders one is just clutching onto a vibe which died years ago. It’s depressing like you. You’re the type of person who will hog a speaker at a party and only play The Coral, Catfish and The Bottlemen or Red Hot Chilli Peppers. In short: you give off Reading Festival energy and it’s hellish.
Gin and tonic
You have undeniable Tory energy. You absolutely love nothing more than lecturing all your mates on some dumb topic which you think makes you sound really intelligent.
Vodka lime soda (aka a Skinny Bitch)
You have Real Housewife energy. If you love this low-cal zinger there’s no denying you’re a gym girlie or gay who wants to get sloshed while quenching your thirst/watching your waist line. You also definitely adore suffocating your lungs with fruity Elf bars.
Come rain or shine, this dirt cheap bev’s gonna get you feeling fuzzy. You can’t say it’s the most refreshing (more pissy), but you simply can’t pass up the ‘4 for £5’ deal and 7.50 percent alcohol content. If you’re stingy af and deep in your overdraft, you’d be a FOOL to drink anything but these black beauties on a summer’s day at the park.
A professional woo girl, who no matter the weather is downing prosecco like it’s going out of fashion. Every prosecco girly spends her summer weekends at The Ship in Wandsworth or the latest bottomless brunch. You could call her basic to her face and she would thank you.
Have a proper drink please.
A good idea at the time, then you spend the rest of the day with your teeth aching and your brain trying to unfreeze itself and get back to normal functionality.
This is what you have when you’re 18 on your first group holiday and you’ve decided to keep that Ayia Napa spirit up for the next five years. It’s essentially a dessert in a cup, you’re not drinking this for the booze content but for the creamy deliciousness, and if that’s the case you’re better off with an ice cream.
Essentially watered down rum with a sprinkle of sugar. A bland drink for a bland individual.
That year abroad in Spain really changed you, and you want people to know that you are now a sophisticated European who doesn’t eat dinner until 10, and engages in intellectual debate over a fruity wine concoction.
Your dad drinks this. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone under the age of 25 order a Peroni.
Amstel is hands down the Diet Coke of the beer world. It’s refreshing, light, elegant and fit for purpose all year round. You can wash down anything with a pint of Amstel.
The exclusive posh boys drink.
You’ve got it in your head that you are better than everyone else in the room. You fully think your taste buds are superior.
This is a really heavy beer and not really a summer vibe but we’ll go with it still. Wait, has a 56-year-old man from Margate just wound up on this article?
Pink gin and tonic
You are the Fiat 500 in your friendship group and you were definitely bullied at school. You’re not quite soulless and live for the weekends when it comes to going out with your girls.
Screams I went to Durham Uni. Cans are only for when you stumble into a Brixton offie drunk. You sir, drink out of bottles. Dressed in a slightly wavey Ralph Lauren shirt, you can always be seen with a 660ml bottle of Moretti in the right hand, signet ring on the left.
Buzz cut. Chain. White t-shirt. And tbf, genuinely wore all those things before it became a trend. Big into their underground music. They’ve swapped three years at Leeds for a tiny bedroom in Peckham. Always mysteriously very good at pool.