Compose an Indian takeaway order and we’ll guess where you’re from

If all the takeaway options in the world were to have a big scrap in the school playground, the mighty Indian curry would, quite frankly, batter the absolute shit out of all possible alternatives (especially pizza). Seriously, if you knew for a fact you were going to die tomorrow and your last meal had to be a takeaway, you wouldn’t even think twice: you’re having a curry – and since you’re dying tomorrow you don’t even have to deal with the post-curry-poo. It’s a win-win.

But the precise mechanics of the curry you’re ordering inevitably depend on where you’re from. Are chips acceptable or a heresy punishable by exile? Are you drinking a beer or water with your curry? Are you going to share??? The below quiz will accurately predict where in the UK you are from provided you answer all the questions honestly – i.e. don’t lie and say you’re having a Madras when you’re obviously a massive Korma-guzzling wuss. I will know.

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