Best Clubbers: Week four

‘May the odds (of pulling) be ever in your favour’ 


Rather like The Hunger Games (but minus the good-looking people), Oxford’s clubbers are, one by one, disappearing and succumbing to the allure of revision, leaving only the fiercest, bravest, and downright craziest to fight it out till the bitter end.

But who are these heroes you ask? The Gold-Rushers? The Crew-Daters? The Anubaes?

Well luckily for you, The Tab has trawled through Facebook to find you these battle-hardened warriors.

Weapon: Crutches
Neutralises: Park End Sharkers

Weapon: Excessively Wavey Clubbing Attire
Neutralises: Chart-Music Lovers

Weapon: Creepy Anuba DJ
Neutralises: I should hope everyone…

Weapon: Sausage
Neutralises: Women

Weapon: God
Neutralises: Cheese-Floor Demons

Weapon: Drunk, Sweaty Over-Enthusiasm
Neutralises: Surrounding clubbers

The Winner. On the D-floor till the bitter end.