A definitive list of why freshers lose all of their freshness in first year
Literally just do the washing up
First year took it out of us all. You aged quicker than expected and Leeds, your dream uni, ended up making you a bit rough around the edges. But at what point did you go from a bright and shiny fresher to a malnourished student?
It all starts when you walk out of Parksinon and see the 24 Hour sign outside of Tesco
In that moment, little did you know that you would soon replace all those home cooked nutritious meals with a Tesco meal deal for the rest of first year. You'll discover Bakery 164 later on in the year but, by this point, you are fiercely loyal to meal deals. Long live T-E-S-C-O, for that is where first years suffering from malnutrition will go.
You'll probably return to Bakery 164 during second year when you realise to achieve at low 2:1 you actually have to feed your brain and of course, with age your tastes become a little more refined.
When you come out of your first and last night in Pryzm to find McDonalds
You're not in Tesco anymore. You most certainly spent the most part of the early morning ordering everything off the saver menu. It was never really a saver menu anyway, you just felt like you spent less and got more value for your money by getting it from that part of the menu.
I mean, you've already spent £20 on £3 meal deals the previous week, and your guilty drunken conscious just couldn't justify a large deluxe big mac meal.
Buying all your alcohol from the cheap corner shop that everyone raved about
You tried to convince yourself it wasn't knock off. The VKs definitely taste dodgy, but you drink them every night anyway. Suddenly your taste for expensive alcohol ceases to exist, or even matter anymore.
Trying to keep up with drinking games, while knowing Frosty Jacks never sits too well with you
You often suffer greatly from your bad decisions. You've been known to accidentally knock yourself out in Space after one too many jager bombs. Coincidentally you're not unfamiliar to the accident and emergency territory of Leeds hospital after your first year.
Not having a dishwasher resulted in your flat playing washing up buckaroo
The absence of a dishwasher was a bit of a culture shock. What was even harder was learning how to strategically place pans on top of pans, without ever washing more than one at a time.
You're convinced the physical and mental endurance of washing up took its toll on your overall appearance after first year, and vow to do as little as possible in second year. Or just sign for a house with a dishwasher, genius.
Waking up in some outlandish place, with no memory of how you got there
You wake up partially paralyzed from the place or position you'd slept in. Most likely, the stairs or elevator in your halls because seriously, that shit is impossible when intoxicated.
The amount of alcohol that entered and left your body in first year has left you feeling aghast. The poor diet choices, lack of sleep and curious illnesses are probably half to blame for your fast track ageing. The other half? Just the general lack of personal hygiene and presentation.
Your parents will tell you being rough around the edges is a bad thing. Your mates will tell you you're just becoming a real student of edgy Leeds. Let's just say, carry on rocking them rough edges, at least until you have to get a grad job.
Then you're in deep shit.