Which Kingdom of Westeros is Your Halls?
Winter Is always bloody Coming Up North
Ever wondered which of the Seven Kingdoms of Westeros your halls would be? Well now you have an answer to that burning desire.
James Baillie- Winterfell
I predict you non James Baillier’s will be horrified that it has received the honoured title of Winterfell. But there’s a shit tonne of proof for this one.
Numero Uno: for those of you who live in JB, you will know Roger (the babe in the James Baillie Office, for those who don’t) and it must be agreed that he is well deserving of the title of Ned Stark.
He carries out his accommodation authorities with the zeal and effectiveness of the King’s Hand. Plus he has a great Northern accent.
Secondly, the edgy men-folk of JB have the whole brooding, long haired look going on. Totally a requirement of being a Winterfellian.
Ned Stark was (sadly) the official pioneer of the man bun and JB has taken that look and run with it.
North Hill Court- The Iron Islands
Like the Greyjoys, the inhabitants of North Hill Court are totally encroaching on Winterfell territory. You can very clearly imagine some serious plotting going down in their digs.
Don’t trust them Winterfell, they might end up Theon Greyjoying you.
Plus, no offence, but North Hill Court, like the Iron Islands look pretty darn bleak.
Lupton- The Eyrie
The Eyrie is the epitome of edgy- I mean it’s got a bloody moon door, that’s the GoT equivalent of the moon emoji.
Also its mini castles are called Snow, Moon and Sky, which if they were the names of some people who lived in Lupton, wouldn’t surprise me.
I think it can be agreed that Lupton possesses enough hipster quality for the title of the The Eyrie.
Lysa Arryn would have deffo loved a Canal Mills night in her youth.
Devonshire is the most picturesque halls, just look at that brick work, dayyuum.
Devonshire and Highgarden are practically the same place. Highgarden is full of rich Southerners and the same applies to Dev.
Have you seen the common room? Well if you haven’t its worth befriending a Devonshirer so you can.
They have formal meals with wine and robes, it’s all wooden and they’ve got grass. Margaery Tyrell would be happy there.
The Tannery- The Twins
Never trust the Tannery. The Freys were in a similar boat to them, being a kingdom/hall but lacking the prestige.
They might seem fine now but one day they might get really pissed that their claim to cool accommodation is not being noticed then BAM, Red Wedding.
You’ve been warned guys.
Central Village- King’s Landing
Congrats Central Village, you are the capital of Leeds Uni. How can a building so shiny and big not win the main title?
We all know that there is some serious scheming going on behind those walls that is why you will rarely find a student from a northern hall completely at ease in Central Village.
You may have the TVs and double beds but you also have a Joffrey in there so good luck with that.
Charles Morris- Casterly Rock
Charles Morris is full of the hot, rich kids who are impeccably dressed. They’re like the illuminati of Leeds Uni, which is personally how I see the Lannisters.
Charles Morris is also probably one of the most gossip filled halls- “well it’s bound to be that way when it’s so incestuous” said one begrudging ex James Baillier who wished to remain anonymous.
Because who would want to piss of the Lannisters? Way too scary… they made sure Bran will never walk again.
You say “Surely the wee freshers of Charles Morris can’t be as bad as those blonde monsters?” You remember the Charles Morris Baguette Thief? Point proven.
Oxley- The Wall
Just like the wall, very rarely do you find someone who applies to go to Oxley. Unlucky students just seem to get sent there against their will.
Like the men who take the black, students who live at Oxley have to make sacrifices too: your degree becomes a waste of £9,000 as getting into uni is a trek, no one wants to come round to your house so you have befriend whoever you find yourself living with, going clubbing is a complete mare, and like those on the wall you practically become celibate because no one will come back to your room.
Past Oxley is the real north and all the Kingdoms’ inhabitants are a bit too worried about venturing beyond it. So I guess the rest of the student community is in your debt Oxley. The true heroes of Leeds Uni.
And now the rains weep o’er these halls, with no one there to hear…