BREAKING: Life no longer does stamps
It’s a matter of Life or death
Cambridge students have been left in uproar after the shocking discovery last night that Life has stopped giving you stamps.
Gone are the times when you could go into the dark and dingy basement at 10pm, get a stamp and then return to pres in the comfort of your own college.
Instead, Life has opted for fencing you into a tiny alleyway from which you cannot escape without having to pay the entry fee again for what is honestly a sub-par club.
This heartbreaking revelation was made last night when students descended on the club for the tradition of "Friday Life" only to find their much loved ritual destroyed beyond repair.
Even Memebridge lamented the tragedy, with disgruntled commentators posting that the fake stamps they had gone to great lengths to purchase online no longer worked.
Those who were in Life described the scenes as "chaos", with many calling for a petition to remove the gates and reinstate stamps.
Yet it seems that this is just the tip of the iceberg. The gates already caused chaos at a Friday Life outside of term time. Just how nightmarish scenes will be on the first Sunday Life of term, we don't know. But it may be a matter of life or death.