I tried to use Tinder to make friends

People had other ideas


Who doesn’t love making new friends? If only there was an app that allowed you to choose friends based on appearance, interests, and conversation…

Well ladies and gentlemen, I may have just found a revolutionary new use for Tinder.

Instead of using Tinder to find people to sleep with, I decided to try and find some cool, new local friends – my current ones obviously aren’t good enough.

The Setup 

The perfect bio was of great importance. I needed to create a peng first impression and I thought that mentioning my ‘boyfriend’ would be an ideal way of showing people I was not interested in their penis.

I went for a cute, innocent looking profile photo that made me look like a Disney princess so that the horny people I matched with might think of something other than ramming me long into the night.

A cute cameo from my ‘boyfriend’ on the side of the photo completed the setup.

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The Thirsty Ones

Unsurprisingly, some of the responses I received seemed to suggest that people were interested in other things.

A few thirsty individuals cut right to the chase and right through my invitation to be friends.

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This guy must have heard that girls like confidence…

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I liked how this was a statement. No question mark in sight.

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So eloquent. Some men are just born with that silver tongue.

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Although he was the more stylish of the 4 my childhood dream of being a builder had now been ruined. Maybe this is how Mary approached Joseph?

 

The Friendly Ones

Some people seemed genuinely interested in the things I can offer as a friend, such as a keen insight into the ways of Briz.

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I gave a bit of advice to a pretty solid guy, who I even shared some common interests with. His love of cider could have lead to many a friendly chat in The Apple or Corrie Tap.

However, his illegal tendencies meant I had to draw the line at just acquaintances.

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Some people were just lovely.

 

The Jobs

One of my new tinder friends ended up with a fun artsy opportunity too…

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On Halloween I found myself in Newport being painted green for a photoshoot organised through Tinder.

I don’t know if I can count this as a friendship, considering my time was paid for. However, I did love hearing about his complicated relationship with a Polish lady he had met online.

Hulk is that you?

Hulk is that you?

While I didn’t exactly make any life long friendships, I did enjoy a new insight into the weird world of Tinder. For now, my search to replace my shitty friends continues.