I’m not a pretender, I love Motion

A few days ago an article called ‘Motion: why do we all pretend to enjoy it’ came out on our humble website.

It seems that, for some, Motion just isn’t good enough and that supposedly  we all “pretend” to enjoy it. Go say that to the other 21,000 UoB students who you’ve simultaneously offended.

Its time someone stood up for Motion. Let’s get the facts straight.

Getting there 

Come on freshers don’t take the taxi, has nobody heard of the train from Clifton Down Station? And if you really are a classic UoB student with mummy’s credit card on hand, then its just an average-priced Uber ride away.

Alternatively you could think of it this way, that journey to the Maldives last year wasn’t easy, but was it worth it? Yes, yes it was.

The Queue

Now with the right mindset the Motion queue isn’t even that bad.

We’ve all slipped our way into the front of a queue at least once. You may get a small pang of guilt for doing so but at least you can avoid the seemingly mile long mass of people, you win some – you lose some.

One thing is certain: confidence is key to this petty moral crime.

If you’re actually a decent person then head on down to the back and take heart in the fact that the queue is a good place to have the only conversation of the night you’ll remember.

The Main Room

Look, its a warehouse. What did you expect – The Palace of Versailles?

Motion is made fantastic by two things; the artists who play there and the people who frequent it. We all know the drinks are overpriced, but if you’re dong it right, more booze should be the last thing on your mind when you get there. Don’t go clubbing to appreciate the indoor architecture.

The Smoking Area

If wide-eyed friends who pester you for cigs and water are something to complain about, then why don’t you try Lola Lo’s instead. I hear its full to the brim with an even more exciting demographic – drunk fourteen-year-old Bristol Grammar School boys.

The smoking area is the social heart of Motion where you will meet strange people and have unique conversations, without it the club would just be a smokey warehouse. So take my spare cig, have another piece of gum, i’m having a better time here than those losers in Lounge.

Finally, if you’re only pretending to like Motion, please don’t bother.

Keep yourselves to the triangle and do the rest of us a favour by giving us some more space to crank out our moves. Bristol could do with one less pretender.