Why you should never get into a relationship at uni
Having recently been left a little broken hearted (okay quite a lot), it’s got me wondering whether it’s worth getting into a relationship at uni at all. Couples who get together in halls rarely last until graduation – so what does that make everything in between?
This is why we should all remain single for three years.
You’ll have no friends when it’s over
This is one reason that everyone should be aware of, but specifically for freshers. Okay, so you found your true love whether it was across the lecture hall, on a FAB night or you gave into taboo and slept with your flatmate.
Next thing you know you’ve spent your entire first year with them, haven’t made proper friends elsewhere and if you have, the chances are your other half is friends with them too.
So what happens when its over? Who do you go to? Your friends won’t want to take sides. Your flat certainly won’t be there for you because you’ve hardly seen them for six months. Course friends will have been having such a good time without you that any penetration skills you may have acquired will simply not be enough to get into an already established tight knit group of friends.
You don’t know what truly makes you happy yet
Going into a relationship – not just so early in uni but also early in life – means you aren’t really giving yourself an opportunity to find out what makes you happy. You’re relying on somebody else to do that instead.
It means putting yourself into such a vulnerable position that all your happiness is put into the hands of someone else. Do you not know how DANGEROUS that is. They can destroy that at any second. And if they do, you have not established yourself enough as a person yet to fall back onto something else.
If your boyfriend/girlfriend is the only thing you have passion for and you don’t know how else to make yourself happy then you really need to do some soul searching if you want a healthy happy future.
It’s just so god damn stressful
Liking someone is amazing – I get it – and if its done right then maybe there shouldn’t be any stress. But all it takes is one drink too many at Snobs and all the problems and doubts you’ve had come flooding out.
“You don’t like me enough,” she cries through vodka laced tears. “You don’t let me see my friends!” He moans through lad-culture fuelled rage. The next morning it’s all cuddles and everyone’s happy again.
Until boys, you like Emma’s Instagram picture from the night before cos she was looking pretty decent at Snobs or girls, your boyf is too hungover to go into town with you like you promised. Just be single. You can cry as much as you want, like whoever’s picture you want, you can see your mates whenever you want and you let nobody down if you cancel plans.
The long distance thing is an issue
Some people make this work, but you have to accept the chances are when you meet someone at Uni that they aren’t going to be five minutes down the road like your ex in Year 10.
When you’re back at home you will have to deal with spending so much time away from them. Or if you go and visit them you’ll be abandoning your friends and family who haven’t seen you in so long. How can you do that to them? What a terrible child you are.
When you spend every waking second with someone at uni and then have to go from 100 to zero over the long holiday periods, it can be so emotionally draining. Lover = pain. No lover = no pain. I didn’t need a Maths degree to figure that out.
The break up is inevitable
The chances are that you won’t stay with your university boyfriend. Years abroad get in the way, masters courses prolong the stay at university, moving back home after graduation – they’re all obstacles that can almost always guarantee some sort of break up along the way. And then what? Every single one of your last three years will be tarnished with memories of your once lover. “I would never look back at it in regret because it was great at the time.”
Yes, at the time. It is no longer that time and you don’t have any crazy wild FAB memories to look back on because you probably had an early night in with bae.
Maybe you didn’t even do the year abroad in the end because you wanted to stay and graduate together. THE REGRET. Or the “re-later-gret” as I like to call it. The relationship regret you get later on when you realise you wasted three years on someone instead of making memories for yourself. Relatergret. Don’t be a victim, get single.