Onesie hero Chris tells us how to impress the ladies this Valentine’s Day

He’s the local legend best known for wearing nothing but onesies last year, and now he’s here to give his top tips for pulling a bird this Valentine’s Day.

He’s ditched the onesies and is all suited and booted, and with Desperation Day banging on our doors, here’s Chris Kiff’s advice for blokes everywhere on how to work your way into that special lady’s heart.

He’s landlord at the Nag’s Head

It’s a big thumbs down from Chris for the top knot, so if you’re rocking that trend you should ditch it, fast. And it’s an even firmer no for super skinny jeans.

He said: “Start with the shoes. Don’t try to oversell yourself.”

Chris showed off his abundant collection of suits and ties to us. He warned that women can tell when you’re peacocking, so the best idea is to dress in what you’re comfortable, and not dress to impress others. You should always “dress for yourself”.

One side of Chris’s extensive suit collection

When it comes to holding conversations with women, Chris has some gems he could give to all of us singletons.

He said: “Don’t go full on, keep it simple – say you like her smile. There aren’t many women who don’t like compliments, and it’s all about the approach. Don’t be aggressive, there has to be some gentlemanly vibe to it. Honesty is the best policy.

“It’s all about compliments and giving people compliments. A good one is to ask if they’ve done their hair. They’ll either say yes, and you’ll get points for noticing, or no and you say it looks nice.”

One fine example of Chris’s wardrobe

Chris showing Nathan the love

Chris’s most bizarre trick for the girls is the glory of a slow cooker, as it’s “the way to a woman’s heart”. You heard it here first, gents.

But the most important tip Chris left us with is that being courteous is the most vital element when it comes to getting in with that special lady.

He said: “Showing love to somebody is showing kindness to each other.”

The romantic confessed: “I love seeing people in romantic situations, I love when I see people in love.”