All hail Maura Higgins, the nation’s new feminist queen
We stan a horny legend
Last night, Love Island's best moment ever happened. After securing a night in the Hideaway with 29-year-old model Tom, Maura was excited to spend a night with him. Naturally the Islanders all started interrogating the pair about whether or not they would shag, and just as Maura went to collect Tom for their night alone, he uttered the immortal words:
"It'll be interesting to see if she's all mouth."
In one lightning flash moment of stupidity, Captain Shovelface zoomed past Amy, Joe, and Danny to become the most hated man in the villa, while Maura rapidly ascended to the throne, as the Queen of Love Island.
But, here's the thing: Maura has always been great value, and here's why:
She put Tom in his place like the rat he is
Going back to that moment, you can see there's a lot Maura has to contend with. For starters, the girls are all gassing her to shag Tom, for no other reason than she'd been so open about her sexuality during her time in the villa.
Then she heads out to see Tom rolling around on the bed with the boys, one of whom hands him a condom as though the sex is a done deal. If the red flags weren't already apparent enough, she then gets to hear Tom's humiliating comment not once, but twice.
Despite everyone in the villa seemingly being in on the joke, Maura stood her ground, calling out Tom's comment for the nasty bit of misogyny it was, and (if tonight's preview is anything to go by) cancelling their trip to the Hideaway.
There's a lot Maura just isn't having in that five-minute clip alone: The presumptuous of the girls, the living #unilads group chat that is the boys, and of course Tom's attempt to use the comment as a weird last minute attempt at chirpse.
Everyone was thinking what Tom was actually dumb enough to say, but only Maura would have had the BDE to call any of them out on it.
She doesn't have medieval beliefs about how many people women should sleep with
Asked how many people she'd slept with, Maura answered that her body count was five, a fact which shocked the other girls. Maura quickly clarified that she'd been in a nine-year relationship with her fiancé before the relationship "fizzled out."
Shock soon turned to approval however, and Molly-Mae said to her: "Kudos to you. Proud of you. Keep those numbers low."
Obviously this kind of outlook is massively slut shame-y and Maura was totally on the money not rising to it.
Watching Maura you can tell she understands it doesn't actually matter how much sex anyone has, or how many people they've had it with. Which is also probably why…
She is the only Islander who openly speaks about sex like an adult
Let's be real, this year's contestants have been a bit lame when it comes to getting on it. It's hard to imagine them one day all shagging at the same time, or doing it over the covers à la Emma and Terry. None of them even talk about it.
But Maura discussing sex openly is refreshing, mainly because the other Islanders only ever discuss it like a group of teenagers at a house party.
Maybe I'm being weird, and I should be happy watching Curtis holding court meetings with the boys to allude to how he fingered Amy the night before. But honestly, having someone on a show about relationships openly discussing sex shouldn't be as rare as Maura has shown it to be, and it has only highlighted how backwards some the Islanders views about sex are.
She gets how Love Island works and cracks on
As a bombshell in Love Island, you either have to grab the one singleton in the villa, or try to steal someone else. Maura, displaying Megan Barton-Hanson levels of shagger energy, opted for the latter.
True, it made some people uncomfortable just how full-on she was with Tommy, but at the end of the day you have to crack on when you're in the villa.
Maura understands Love Island needs drama and a good laugh every now and then. She's consistently fun to watch, her horny chat is hilarious, and if you didn't think Maura felating an ice lolly was absolute golden television, you're lying through your goddamn teeth.
She was there for Lucie when all the other girls excluded her
Remember when the girls all fell out with Lucie because she didn't hang out with them? All Lucie was "guilty" of was wanting to spend time with the guys more than the girls.
Granted, there were some who thought this was a classic case of internalised misogyny on Lucie's part, but the long and short of it is Lucie spent a good chuck of time in the villa with no mates – except Maura.
Being a good mate on Love Island isn't going to get you any nearer to the £50,000 prize, or the heaps of #sponcon cash afterwards. That doesn't matter to Maura, she's just a good egg.
If that weren't enough, Maura was able to patch things up with Molly-Mae even after she turned Tommy into a human climbing frame.
She can deep throat a carrot
I mean come the fuck on. Either you were on the floor howling at Maura during that whole challenge last night, or you're a legitimately boring person.
We have to stan.