How to use Tinder to find a relationship, by people who have done it

Tell me your secrets


Gone are the days where finding a relationship online is seen as seedy or just a bit weird. Instead, Tinder and Bumble are now breeding grounds (lol) for genuine luv and compatibility.

But the big question is, how do these mystical people go from sending a super-like accompanied by a dodgy chat up line, to booking a week long holiday in Croatia? What are they doing right which you, singleton, are doing so wrong?

We asked people who are now shacked up in love thanks to Tinder how to create the perfect bio and have the perfect chat, so your days of loneliness can finally be over.

Gigi, been in a relationship for four months

Opening line: His opening line was “Hey Gigi, what're you up to on this beautiful day?"

What did your profile bio say: I literally was using it for a job to get clients to sell insurance so it said “only here for business and networking".

What pictures did you use: My pics are just of me, I have a selfie, a pic of me eating pizza, a fitnessy picture, and a picture of me as a sexy Darth Vader on Halloween.

How many messages until the move to iMessage: We started texting after six messages.

First date: We went to a Taco bar near where he lives.

How long until it was official: A week later. We had this conversation about if we wanted to be exclusive, if we were in this for the long term etc., and just decided to make it official.

How long until you had sex: We haven't had sex yet because the more I like someone the more I want to wait!

Any advice for singletons: If you want a boyfriend or girlfriend from Tinder, you should meet somewhere where you guys will both enjoy yourselves as well as be able to have a conversation. Don't go to his house because you'll probably end up fucking and not getting to know each other, and don't go to a place like the movies because you can't really talk.

Lucy, been in a relationship for two months

Opening line: “Would've super liked but I wasted it on my friend I'm sorry for already letting you down."

Days until the move to iMessage: We messaged back and forth on Tinder until the day of our date, so like four days.

First date: We went for drinks at a rooftop bar – he decided. But then the date ended up lasting 27 hours (it was completely innocent, I fell asleep watching a film), so it was basically drinks, film and breakfast all in one.

How long until it was official: It was a week before we made it official as we were hanging out everyday anyways. We were basically together straight away, it was a bit of a whirlwind.

How long until you had sex: The third or fourth date.

Advice for singletons: You shouldn't take it too seriously, or be too nervous. Just take it as it comes, be spontaneous and see who you vibe with. Also make sure your Spotify is connected, it's easier to find things in common to start a convo.

Olivia, been in a relationship for three months

Opening line: “Hey x"

What did you profile bio say: My bio was simple: “you’ll probably find me shopping in Zara".

What pictures did you use: I had three pics, one of me with my friends on a night out, one of me on my holidays and then a selfie. I don’t have many pictures of myself so I kept it short and sweet.

How many messages until the move to iMessage: Probs about two days worth of frequent messaging before it moved to iMessage.

First date: We went to a bar near my uni, he wanted to go to an art exhibition but it was lashing it down so we went to a bar near the train station to avoid the rain. However on the second date, he borrowed his mate's dog and we took it for a walk round the park, it was super cute.

How long until it was official: Four dates worth.

How long until you had sex: After two dates.

Advice for singletons: If you want something more substantial then just let the person know, if you are both on the same page then its better than being a million miles away.

Diyora, been together for a couple of months

Opening line: “Aren't you meant to be one of my new Tab writers?" The conversation started off as very platonic so there was no pressure or terrible flirting which usually makes things awkward.

What did your profile bio say: My profile was pretty basic. I wrote what was I was studying at uni and the fact that I appreciate a political debate or a good serial-killer documentary.

What pictures did you use: I had various pics of me and group shots with friends at festivals and night outs, but no selfies because I think they can be a bit forced sometimes.

Days until the move to iMessage: I can’t remember exactly but it took a while for that to happen. I wasn’t taking the Tinder match seriously until I saw him at an event and thought I would drop him a Facebook message.

First date: He decided to take me to a really cute tea-room where we got to know one another for a couple of hours. Then I bumped into him in a club later on in the night, we really hit it off then.

How long until it was official: We were very chilled about the whole thing, we only thought it would make sense if we were official after seeing each other for five months. Modern romance eh?

Advice for singletons: Don’t actively look for a relationship. It’s pointless settling down with someone for the sake of being with someone. Keep swiping until the right person comes along.

Sunnii, been in a relationship for 10 months

Opening line: He said “General misdemeanours sounds kind of boring, always preferred the unusual ones myself”. It was something to do with my bio. I gave up texting people first after someone messaged me saying my name made me a 3/10, or invites for sex.

What pictures did you use: I had three or four photos, my first one was a very impressive selfie from Ibiza that made me look really pretty. I had no group photos, just photos that I thought would either start conversation or show my best features.

How many messages until the move to iMessage: I’d say 50-75. We just spoke a lot and then he asked for my number because apparently he had ‘no signal’ (but really he just wanted my number). We moved on to texting from then on.

First date: He decided the first date, and I brought it forward and we ended up seeing each other the night before for cocktails. We went somewhere local round mine and ended up having a great make-out sesh by the end.

How long until it was official: It became a thing really quickly, until I called him up on the second night of uni drunk off my face on tequila, asking him when the fuck I was going to become his girlfriend.

How long until you had sex: After the second date. Basically the only reason I didn’t sleep with him sooner is because my dad was home and then we didn’t stop.

Other articles recommended by the author:

– These are officially the most swiped-right UK students in 2018

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– I told guys on Tinder I loved them and this is how they reacted

– This is what happens to your Tinder profile when you delete the app