Sit back, relax and look at the filthiest clubbers of Glastonbury 2017

Every weekend, we at The Tab bring you the best clubbers from all the corners of the UK. It is our civic duty, and we perform it without complaint. Yet herein lies our conundrum: how do we give you the best clubbers, when no clubbers are clubbing at any clubs?

The youths of Britain have done a Theresa May, rapidly descending upon the wheaten fields of Somerset for a right old knees-up like they do every year.

Thus, in the spirit of trying to feel included even though we (and you) weren’t invited, we thought we’d bring you the next best thing – here are the best clubbers of Glastonbury 2017 so far.

Good boy of the week

When you visit your dad in prison and his mates won’t stop leering

When you book a few days off from the Death Star to let your inner rebel out

When someone behind you says they have cold ones to crack, but no boys to crack them with

Didn’t know your dad was going to Glastonbury

When you scoop a spider up and take it outside instead of squashing it

When someone tells you Starbucks have released a new flavour of frappucino

When your mate didn’t get a ticket but you’re a helpful friend

An actual photo of me posing with my dissertation

The floor is <10 likes on an Instagram picture