Every Uni of York college as a song on Sabrina Carpenter’s new album Short n’ Sweet

Sabrina Carpenter’s new album Short n’ Sweet dropped last Friday and it is frankly another no skip album. Sabrina has already been skyrocketing to pop princess status with the success of her two singles Espresso and Please Please Please and this album is just as iconic.

With such a range of tunes that I have had on a constant loop, I couldn’t help but match up each new song to one of the Uni of York colleges. Although, there is not the same number of colleges to songs, so I have had to place two songs in the same college.

For all those freshers that are pop girlies but can’t wrap their heads around the vibes of each college, hopefully this will be the perfect indication.

Taste – Langwith

The first song on the album should be awarded with one of the first colleges at York. Taste is the next single from the album and on the road to becoming the next big pop classic. This fits Langwith’s vibe perfectly: As a party-central college, they “leave quite an impression”. Get ready to hear this on every Langwith girl’s getting ready playlist.

Please Please Please – James

As one of the most well-known songs on the album, this matches James as one of the most recognisable colleges at York. With James being full of sporty boys with questionable reputations, they do have the tendency to beg girls to not “embarrass them”. Let’s just say Barry Keoghan would fit right in.

Good Graces – David Kato

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With David Kato’s mysterious reputation, it became a literal gated community. This lends itself well to Good Graces as it has the theme of dropping an ex – you can literally cut off anyone you don’t want to see outside of Kato’s gates. Kato students could definitely be seen saying “you do something sus, kiss my cute ass bye”.

Sharpest Tool – Halifax

With Halifax being so far out of everything, “we never talk about it”, much like the hook of the chorus. However, within its own community, there is a lot of drama going on which is much like this song. I see Sharpest Tool as the relationship between Halifax and the rest of the colleges; it is like the other colleges forgotten ex.

Coincidence – James (again)

Sorry to bring down the reputations of boys from James a second time, but some have probably two timed a few girls in their time. There are many girls that you have “told the truth to, minus seven percent”.

Bed Chem – Derwent

As the closest college to the chemistry block, this had to be the perfect choice. Also, the stories of promiscuity from Derwent students perfectly fit the cheeky nature of this song. As a college with a lot of northerners, they could be described as “the cute boy with the white jacket and the thick accent”.

Espresso – Vanbrugh

Vanbrugh is constantly “working late ‘cus they’re a singer”. Vanbrugh, the most musical college, definitely has the same energy as this catchy chorus. Just in the centre of west campus, it is at the heart of everything – which Espresso also is in this album. Unproblematic and fun, Espresso and Vanbrugh have got everyone “wrapped around their finger”.

Dumb & Poetic – Alcuin

Alcuin is probably the most poetic of all the colleges as they are closest to all the great works of literature in the library. I would argue this is one of the slowest songs on the album, matching Alcuin’s laid back and calm vibe.

Slim Pickins – Anne Lister

As a very female dominated college, there is frankly Slim Pickins when it comes to finding a man in Anne Lister. Especially if “god forgot your gay awakening”, then you may have to venture outside of your college boundaries to find someone. For now, “if you can’t find the one you love, I guess it’s them you will be kissing”.

Juno – Goodricke

As a highly underrated song (so far) on the album, it matches Goodricke in its nature of being overlooked. The chorus of the song gives off 2010s Katy Perry vibes, which I think would go down very well at Goodricke pres. Also, it is probably the most promiscuous song on the album, without anyone realising, which I would say also would match the mysterious goings on in Goodricke…

Lie To Girls – Constantine

Constantine is for the girlies. They’re constantly hyping each other up about their love lives and, I hate to say it, but also feeding each other’s delusions about those Connie boys that definitely are not the one, as “if they like you, they will lie to themselves”. This song is for the girlies living in delusion. It will get better over there.

Don’t Smile – Wentworth

Wentworth is the home of postgraduates who are all coming to the end of their time at university, so they will resonate with the chorus “don’t smile because it happened, cry because it’s over”. With postgrads having to knuckle down while watching freshers recklessly abandon their assignments for a night out, I think they will relate to the lyric “you think it’s happy hour, for me it’s not”.

Featured image via Instagram @SabrinaCarpenter and Island Records

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