My afternoon as a nude model, wearing paint instead of clothes

“So… just take it off?”

“Yeah, take it off.”

Standing in a slightly cold photography studio lit by a couple of umbrella lights with two girls I just met, I took it off. All of it, except the undies.

But this isn’t the beginning of a stereotypical male fantasy — sorry to disappoint. It’s the beginning of me stepping out of my comfort zone. Actually, not just stepping out. I stepped out, drove around the block, got on the highway and went to a completely different zone. That’s how out of my comfort zone I was.

So why did I put myself in the position to be a body painting model if I wasn’t comfortable with it?

Because there is a negative narrative in our society about women’s bodies that I wanted to challenge. I felt the need to do something that was much greater than just myself. To represent how beautiful and powerful women are and how some women neglect their beauty because of prejudgments of today’s culture. I needed a way to show my respect and love for women who should be reminded endlessly how much they’re appreciated, and I found it when I was surfing through Instagram one day.

A like here, a comment there, handing out red hearts like they’re candy. And then, my eyes land on something strange — breasts. I was confused because I made it a point to not follow any “Instagram Hoes” so I wouldn’t have to see the shameless promotion of oneself as a sex object on my timeline. But after a closer look, I saw what was on the breasts — paint.

A Radford art student, Jasmyne, was trying something different and started painting her body, then bravely put the pictures on Instagram. She used her body as a canvas to create eye-capturing works of art (her A Tribe Called Quest “Midnight Marauders” recreation snatched my edges and slayed my life- there’s no other way to put it).

I was intrigued. In every picture, she exuded confidence in a way I hadn’t experienced before, and she did it with her nipples out. After a couple of months passed, I noticed that she was including other people in these body painting sessions. After a little, or a lot, of liquid courage, I “slid in her DM’s” and asked to collaborate. Five days later I found myself in Radford, stripping in front people I just met in person.

“It might be a little cold,” Jasmyne said right before she put the paintbrush on my skin. It was cold but not uncomfortably so. She played music on her laptop to minimize any awkward silence, though there really wasn’t any. Luckily we found things to talk about and with every stroke of the brush I felt my anxiety lessen and I became more comfortable.

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The painting took about an hour. By the end my body was cramping from trying to stand up straight, despite my atrocious posture, and the room had gotten colder. But I didn’t care, I was ready to pose.

Although I was almost completely naked, the paint made it feel like I was clothed and my already high self-esteem was made even higher with the positive feedback I got about my body from Jasmyne and her photographer friend, Ashley.

I stepped onto the white backdrop with two lights on either side of me and Ashley in the middle to do my solo shots. I couldn’t help but feel powerful.

I’m not quite sure why I felt so powerful, but I did. Perhaps because I was in the presence of two dope black women pursuing their passions on a Friday night instead of getting turnt. Perhaps because I felt soulful with the motherland painted on my small chest. Or perhaps because the theme itself was Black Girl Magic- a phrase that summarizes how beautiful, impactful, and strong black women are.

With every click of the camera that echoed in the small room, I became more confident. My flaws seemed to melt away and I no longer cared that I had small breasts, cellulite for days, stretch marks that resembled a tiger, or jiggly arms. I felt proud to be there in front of the camera, ready to show the world what black girl magic looks like.

After a few pictures alone, Jasmyne joined me with the Pan-African flag and a black power fist painted on her chest. She stood next to me, put her hand around my hip, and we posed for the camera. I was a little nervous because there was a semi-naked woman next to me, which is something I’ve never experienced soberly before. But her comfortableness transferred to me and I shed my feelings of awkwardness. We went through various “strong women” poses, while laughing and singing along to the music in between shots.

By the last click, I didn’t feel naked anymore, in fact I forgot I didn’t have clothes on as we stood and talked bare chested for a bit after we were done. I was completely relaxed, there was no urgency to get my shirt and cover myself up or make an excuse to get out of there faster. I was comfortable. I was free.

Follow the author @Littlerosiesturn and the artist @Artbyjasmyne on Instagram.