If Nottingham’s nightclubs were part of your friendship group, who would they be?

Ocean is here for a good time, not a long time


We visit them to laugh, cry, relax and let off some steam; Nottingham’s world-renowned selection of nightclubs have given us tons of great memories and perhaps a few we would rather forget.

Nonetheless, through the ups and the downs we can always rely on a good night out as the ultimate pick-me-up. At this point, these clubs are basically our besties anyway, but who do they represent in your friendship group?

Pryzm is the hype queen

Decked out from head-to-toe in Oh Polly’s finest, PRYZM may look like a soft touch, but deep down she’s a tough cookie. I mean, until you bring up her ex-boyfriend of two years during your deep convo in the club toilets.

Best believe those falsies will be washed away in floods of tears and Echo Falls by the end of the night. Ah well, nothing like a good cry to the High School Musical soundtrack or maybe a cheeky mosh to that Skepta X Martin Garrix remix.

Ok, so despite her preened and polished exterior PRYZM may be a mess, but she will always be the first to hype you up when needed. Just try to ignore her suffocating aroma of Bondi Sands and cheap perfume.

Rock City is dependable

Rock City is the reliable friend. Some might label him a ‘Plain Jane’, but you know there is no shame in liking the classics. Nonetheless, his music taste is just as bland as his clubbing uniform, which usually consists of a Ralphy polo neck and a pair of bootleg jeans.

He will probably leave early because of his ultimate frisbee practice in the morning. Will you notice his absence? Probably not.

However, if he musters the strength to stay out with you until after 1am you know you’re in for a messy night. Luckily, a wave of beer fear will hit him in the morning causing him to clean up the entire house as an apology. Sounds like a win-win situation to me.

Stealth is too cool for school

Ok can someone please tell Stealth that Detonate was nearly two months ago? That wristband has practically disintegrated off her wrist, but she’s hot and mysterious, so she gets away with it. Well, until she opens her mouth and her chain-smoking habits become abundantly clear.

Stealth never attends her lectures, she’s way too cool for that. She spends most of her time at underground raves and tends to avoid the mainstream clubs. This is usually because her collection of piercings set off all the metal detectors and the rim of her bucket hat always seems to cover her true identity. Therefore, the more obscure the DnB rave the better. Is she really your mate or just a figment of your imagination? You decide.

Ocean is Mr Popular

Anyone smell that? Seems like Ocean is just as cheesy as his music taste, yet this VK-chugging machine has always been renowned as a strangely loveable character. In fact, he’s so popular that you often have to message him before the night just to catch a cheeky glimpse.

Despite his goofy persona and the multiple STI allegations, he always manages to pull the fittest one in the club. Regardless of his haters, it cannot be denied that nights out just hit different when Ocean’s on board.

Pop World exists

Pop World is simply a part of the furniture. Their mature student days are coming to an end and to be honest now they’re just ancient. When did they become a part of the group? Who knows. Will they ever leave? Probably not.

Pop World is the friend that never quite makes it into the group photo, which is probably for the best because his lurking presence is often a depressing reminder of life post-graduation. On the rare occasion that Pop World is bearable to be around, you always seem to be absolutely trollied. Coincidence? I think not.

Unit 13 is mysterious

Unit 13 is the new kid on the block. Sure, she’s likeable, but is she cool enough to make the cut. Her initiation is pending, so watch this space.

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