I went on six identical Tinder dates with six different boys – this is what I learnt
Single life it is then…
One boring afternoon back in March, my friends and I were discussing what we were giving up for lent. My friend Ellie was going to be vegan for the whole of lent, my friend Emily said she was giving up on work, whilst I decided I was pretty happy and didn't want to give up anything.
It was then my friend Tilly who turned to me and said "Why don't you have a boyfriend for Lent?" This was followed by some obvious and won't lie quite rude laughter. I decided I was going to accept Tilly's suggestion, and I said that for every week in Lent I would go on one Tinder date.
I wanted to make this scientific, a classic year six science experiment. I kept all variables the same, except for the guy. I figured that way I might be more likely to find someone who I actually like, as I wouldn't base my enjoyment of the date on anything other than the person it was with. It's basic science guys.
So here is my little story. Six weeks, six identical dates with six different guys. The same outfit (green top, black denim jeans, heeled boots), the same bar (Pepper Rocks), the same first line ("Hey you alright? How's your day been, better now you're here I assume?"), the same drink (a G&T), the same day of the week (Tuesday), and the same me (I hope).
1. The emotional wreck
It was going pretty well. We were about an hour into the date, he was cute and funny. Then, his phone rang – he ignored it. And then it rang again, he put it on silent. But then the third time it rang, I said "I think you should answer that, someone is clearly trying to get hold of you." He looked sheepish. "It's okay," he said "It's my ex." I stayed chill, it's fine, we all have an ex right? "How long have you been single?" The answer: THREE DAYS. After a five year relationship. I made my excuses and headed home.
He then continued to text me for about a week after, saying how he REALLY liked me (sure hun). He even got some mutual friends to bug me and say I should give him a chance. No thanks, sorry!
2. The second team rugby guy
This is a classic. Are you even a student if you don't in some way get involved with a rugby boy? I was relieved when he turned up to see he was wearing normal clothes and not his rugby stash. (This is a rare sight. I am since yet to see a rugby boy who is not hammered in a tie on a Wednesday night or wearing tight university-crested shorts.)
He was undeniably extremely attractive. The conversation though? "Oh yeah so you know Chadders, he got SLAUGHTERED on Wednesday night, had a game the next day was SO jokes because then Dodders tore his hamstring." Even though I may have known a couple of the BNOC names he dropped, I decided I couldn't be a part of this world.
3. The aquaintance's ex
I was pretty excited about this one. He looked cute, the chat was good and we knew a few people in common. We had a good date and he walked me home. As usual, I debriefed the girls the next day.
"Oh dear…" said my housemate "you know thats A's ex right?" No, I did not. Although A and I didn't really know eachother, only by name and face, I fully know the pain of seeing your ex with someone new. I couldn't be that girl. Goodbye boy 3.
4. The nice guy
This one is quite sad because this guy was honestly LOVELY and we had a good evening, but you know when you're just feeling a friends vibe? I hope he finds an amazing girl because he would be a great boyfriend.
5. The one I actually liked
We really hit it off. A perfect first date, he was good-looking, kind, funny and we just clicked. I got home and was BUZZING telling the girls about him. "Is it too soon to message him? I genuinely think he might like me so I don't think it's weird. How should I play it i really wanna see him again!" Of course, naturally, he ghosted me. Banter.
6. The one going on a year abroad
And so it was week six, I'd almost completed my challenge! I was pretty exhausted and also pretty broke by this point (I am a firm believer of paying for myself on dates. We are all students here, and we should all pay what we owe) so I wasn't holding out much hope.
But this was probably the best date I had. I really liked this guy. We even had silences that weren't awkward, and he asked me questions about my family, my hopes and asirations. Plus he was gorgeous. And then it happened: "So you're graduating this year right? Any plans for next year?" …"Oh yeah I'm going to Australia for a year, maybe even permanently I'm not sure, I'm buzzing!" Ugh. I saw him a few more times and then we both decided we couldn't put ourselves through trying to make it work. Australia is beyond long distance, especially when you've only just met someone.
So turns out, doing six identical tinder dates won't make it more likely to find Mr Right. Or at least it didn't for me. But to be honest, I've not dated anyone since, and I'm so happy. Having a relationship is great, but life is just as great single too. In the mean time, I'm going to save some money, re-think my date location and outfit for the future and perhaps steer clear of Tinder for the time being.