10 reasons why it’s tough being southern in Manchester
Sometimes the great white north is just a bit too much
The North. It makes a man out of you, or so they tell me. All it’s made me so far is cold, wet and irate. The people always look miserable, the rugby is the wrong type and ‘nah mate stop adding r’s to grass’ is now my least favourite phrase. How about another ‘r’ ‘mate’- reprobate. In reality, it can be bloody awful to be Southern up here- in between the relentless mocking and having to ask people to repeat themselves, there are a few things that really grind my gears.
I’m going to attempt to demonstrate what it’s like to be a Southerner up North through helpful gifs, because this is the 21st century, and because nothing’s funnier than a low resolution image repeating itself ad infinitum.
How I feel whenever talking to a Northerner
‘The best thing about the north is the architecture’
Aaaaaand someone’s compared your accent to the Queen’s- yes, of course I regularly partake in afternoon tea and scones at Buckingham Palace.
‘Rugby League is better than Rugby Union’
The reaction to being a Conservative voter, and the four emotional stages that accompany any political discussion with a northener.
Not a Waitrose to be seen, and the standards of behaviour just aren’t the same anywhere else…
Whenever your Northern housemate comes home…
You’ve used a cash machine
And ultimately, your northern friends just leave you feeling a bit like this
Bouncers are definitely gunning for you the moment you open your mouth (That might be my own fault though…)
Ultimately, being a southerner up north is a constant cacophony of ill will and disappointment. They say there’s no north/south divide, but the moment you travel above the Watford gap it all gets a bit less Downton Abbey, and much more Coronation Street. Despite that, one thing keeps me coming back.
My face when I see the price of a pint of beer
And it couldn’t be an article with gifs without a cat, so here’s how I’m sure we’re all feeling about our upcoming exams. Good luck, and try not to get trenchfoot on the way!